Flau'jae Johnson
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My mood swings have been up and down for the past few days. I've been isolating myself from everybody because I don't wanna talk.
My mind has been everywhere and I been thinking a lot about the whole situation.
I feel betrayed.
I feel disrespected.
I'm mad because Angel don't see that she's wrong. What's fucking me up even more is the fact that she completely suppressed my feelings.
She barely know this girl, let alone seen this girl outside of school. I'm just confused
Her being so defensive and not wanting to cut her off makes me think she's cheating.
If she is, I don't want no parts and I'm single. It's literally no coming back from that.
"I say since the day we met I been about you" I rapped to myself while writing it down, "And I can't see myself going nowhere without you"
I threw the pen on the opposite side of the room before sighing loud. I'm not even in the right head space to continue.
Instead of forcing myself to continue, I turned out the lights and got in the bed. I didn't waste no time, I went to sleep immediately.
I woke up the next day and looked at the time to see it was going on five in the afternoon.
I missed all of my classes.
I got up and took care of everything I needed to in the bathroom. Afterwards I slipped on some clothes and left to get something to eat.
It's a new soul food place that just opened and I'm going to try it. I ordered my food and waited for at least twenty minutes
Even though the day is kind of gone I'm still gonna do something with myself. I should be doing my school work, but I'm not.
As I sat in my car eating I talked to my momma. She can never stay put, it's like she has to be up doing something.
"Why not just get Ameen to do it?" I asked while watching her fix my brother's room door
"He at the barber shop, and I ain't waiting" she responded before I just shook my head
"How they take the door off the hinges anyway?"
"Swinging on it, they just be doing stuff" she said before I shook my head again, "I'm sick of them"
"I couldn't get away with stuff like that when I was they age. I would've got in trouble, you need to beat them"
"I'm not beating my kids, Flau'jae" she said being dead serious, "Them my boys"
"Alright"
"You and Angel still ain't talking?" she asked causing me to sigh now getting annoyed
"No ma, I don't wanna talk to her"
"Yes you do, you might as well go over there and y'all figure it out. She posted a picture of y'all on her instagram story" she said before I shrugged a little
"That don't got nothing to do with me, it got everything to do with her" I said before she looked at me as if I said something wrong
"Flau'jae that girl miss you, you know tomorrow make two weeks sinc — "
I cut her off because I'm over the conversation.
"Alright ma ima talk to you later, I love you" I said giving her time to say it back
