Starco Oneshots

The Trials of Marco Diaz

"So... Marco Diaz" Queen Moon began.

Marco was sweating a ton. What if they locked him up and threw away the key? What if they beheaded him!?

"Making out with the Princess of Mewni is a crime punishable by death..." the Queen continued

"My DAUGHTER, YOU HOOLIGAN!" King River bellowed at Marco.

Marco gulped. He was in some deep, deep trouble.

"Mom, Dad... it was my fault... he wasn't making out with me, I was making out with him!!!" Star tried to argue.

"Leave us, Star. We must talk with your 'best friend' here" Queen Moon said.

"But-But-"

"Leave" River said sternly.

Star frowned leaving Marco to... fend for himself.

"So, Marco... tell me EXACTLY what happened between you and my daughter!" River demanded

"Listen! I didn't mean for that to happen! One thing lead to another and-"

"Silence! We wanted an accurate account of what happened between you and my Star!" River asked harshly.

"I'd.. uh.. rather not explain what me and Star were doing..."

"WHY, MARCO? IS IT BECAUSE YOU KNOW IT WAS WRONG?!?!"

"Nono! It's because it's private, okay? We didn't do anything that bad, got it? I'm her boyfriend and well it's my responsibility to-"

"You're her... boyfriend...?" Moon asked.

"Well... yeah"

Moon and River continued their dirty looks at Marco.

"You're not eligible for the throne, Marco" Moon said sternly.

"Wha? What throne?"

"The Butterfly Throne of course. You're not suitable to be the king of Mewni"

"What? Says who?"

"Us!" Moon and River said in unison

"Oh yeah, well I challenge you... to a challenge!" Marco challenged.

"What challenge?" River asked, intrigued.

Marco thought for a moment. He hadn't thought that far.

"I... don't actually know... I just want to prove to you that I'm good enough to be her boyfriend!!!"

River and Moon whispered for a moment.

"So, what do you propose?" Moon asked professionally.

"I say... give me some badass armour, a sword and put me against your best warriors!" Marco said, still unsure.

"Are you sure...? You'd be pulverised..." Moon said confidently.

"Yes. I'm sure. If I win... I get to be Star's boyfriend! And you drop all the charges you have on me!"

"Okay. and if our warriors win... " River began.

River then traced a line on his neck using his finger, making a cutting sound while he did so. Marco got the memo.

"Okay! Later today! I'll see you then!" Marco said confidently.

"Begone... and don't even think about making out with my daughter again, got it!?" River asked angrily.

Marco nodded and ran out of the massive throne room.

...

"What did my parents say, Marco...?" Star asked nervously.