SUMMER CAN LAST FOREVER

EXILE

BELLY
Its been two days since the orientation, since i finally told conrad the truth. Its also been two days since he last talked to me. im not doing well. Ive been in a constant state of anxiety. I really messed up, he was so upset, and to be real he has every right to be upset. Ive been doing a lot of crying, jeremiahs been trying to convice me things will be okay. That he wont leave me, that hes still in love with me. I think im ultra paranoid, because of what happened last year, with us.

The bell rang, signaling the end of the day. I go to my car, and drive home conrads rover is on the street. My mothers also home, great theyre probably having tea, and talking about how horrible i am. I spend five minutes in my car, before walking up to the front door. I shouldnt be so nervous, but i am. My mom and conrad are sitting at the table talking

"i dont know if ive passed them all, ill find out tomorrow, but i feel good about them" i hear him say.

I shut the door behind me, and that causes them to look up"hey belly welcome home. how was school?" she smiles and asks.

"It was um... well it was you know school..." i reply anxious.

"ill be in my office" mom says, looking at me, then conrad.

Conrad sits on the couch, and pats the spot next to him. I follow, and sit next to him. he dosnt say anything for a few minutes, til he sighs. "Im going to preface by saying i love you, and that even though ive been really pissed off at you, that hasent changed. That i still want to be with you, we just have something to work through" conrad states.

Some of my nerves calm down"what am i not doing?" he asks.

"what?" i asked confused.

"what do i need to improve upon, so you feel comfortable telling me everything? Is it my reactions or my words still? You tell jeremiah and taylor, but you cant tell me your big exciting news, you didnt even want to tell me about student council why?!" conrad rattles off. I see the hurt in his eyes.

Even when im the one whose messed up, here he is, somehow thinking its his fault. "Thats not how it is at all, its nothing you did, or didnt do its just about me" i say.

"Im confused, can you explain your reasons for not telling me?" he states.

"Im in high school, and your a big hot shot college guy. I didnt think youd be intested in hearing about high school things. I was going to tell you about running start, and me getting to brown once i heard back. I didnt want to get my hopes, or your hopes too high. Then i kinda thought, id just surprise you on my first day, and tell you then cause itd be cute and romantic" i tell him.

Conrad looks at me "i hate surprises belly, you know that. i hate not knowing, it makes my anxiety worse" he says.

"I know, im sorry, i sprung it on you. Double sorry, it was during mid terms"i sigh.

"Thats the other thing belly, my school is important to me, getting good grades is important. I dont care how big of news it is  do not spring it on me during finals, or midterms week. im already under a lot of stress, and pressure as is" conrad shoots me a look.

"I know, everyone told me to wait, but i didnt listem" i say.

"you never do, youre so stubborn isabel" he replies.

"How do you feel about me doing running start, and it being at brown out of curiousity?" i ask quietly.

"Despite what youve been thinking, not only is this a good opportunity for you, im also happy youll be around. Remember im 2 years ahead of you though, so we probably wont even be in the same classes, but we can eat lunch together every day. Knowing youre at the school will make me even happier, ill worry less about you" conrad looks at me again.