SUMMER CAN LAST FOREVER

HEARTBROKEN AND ALONE

JEREMIAH
Im putting on a good front socially speaking, but on the inside, im dying.  For the second time, a girl i really liked. Maybe was even growing to love, rejected me. I mean taylor didnt technically reject me. Her hooking up with someone, when weve been as buddy buddy as we have tells me all i need to know. I cant get her out of my head though. I just keep thinking about her. What shes doing. who shes with, whose she doing, and how i could treat her so much better than all of them.

I even thought her sleeping in my bed meant something, that she felt something for me. Taylor dosnt snore, which is good. That wouldve driven me insane, had belly and i been together. Not sure how conrad can sleep with her making the sounds of a dumptruck. I guess the thing about love though is when you truely love someone, their annoying quirks just dont bother you. Looking back now, there wouldve been so many things that drove me mad about belly. Theres things about taylor belly finds annoying. She hates how blunt and harsh taylor can be sometimes, but to me i find her honesty hilarious and appealing.

Taylors also not afriad to put a foot down, and say no. Lord knows i need that. Belly would just let me do whatever i wanted. Never telling me when shes upset or when im doing stupid. Plus taylors always getting me out of tough situations. When we went to the fair we sat on the ferris wheel together, she told me all her aspirations. How she wants to become a ceo of a major company, or work in HR. Shes secretly smart, she just plays dumb, so people will like her. Shes definitley on a mission, and wont let others stop her. Shes so confident, somehow insecure on the inside. She wonders if shell ever be good enough, but she is.

Im consumed by my thoughts swirling around. I dont notice we scored, i jump up cause everyone else is too. Im freezing, i shouldve packed multiple outfits. I notice belly pulling down at her sleeves. "Loose thread?" i question

"No its nothing," she sighs. I notice her face is red, probably from cold. Conrad, who i didnt even think was paying attention sighs, takes his red sweater off, and puts it over bellys head. He grabs the hat and gloves from one of the pockets, and places them on her too.

She looks up at him with the purest look, and smiles brightly. Thats what i want. To know someone so well, i can communcate and understand them without words. Thats the truest form of love there is, and they achieved it at such a young age. I just want someone to love me back. Why doesnt anyone ever love me?

Im nice hot confident can bench my weight. I make friends with everyone i meet. Im loud and the life of the party. People just want to hook up with me or be my one night stand. I always thought i was boyfriend material.

"Ill be back, i need hot cocoa- shut the front door. When did you get this?!" Belly exclaims, as conrad hands her a drink.

"On my way back from the bathroom, i stopped and got a thermous from my car. Bought it at concessions, i knew youd ask for it" conrad replies.

Bellys about to cry of happiness, and im about to cry of sadness. Once the games over, we go back to conrad and daniels dorm.

"What a win, that puts us on top of our division!" daniel says excited. Its already 10pm, i really hope we arent partying tonight. Im just not in the mood.

"Where are you guys sleeping?" Conrad inquires.

"My mom paid for a hotel room at the hilton for us this weekend. She said and i qoute "have fun, but not to much. Any extra charges will be ours to pay for" belly explains.

"You gonna go with them?"

"Hmmm nice fluffy hotel bed, or stuffy dorm room?" He contemplates using his hands and arms as a scale, we all laugh.

"My roommate who snores, or my girlfriend who snores ever louder?" he jokes.

"Tough choice. The hotel," he quips. We laugh again at that. My brothers so sassy. I love that hes back to his old self. This is the brother i grew up with.