Stuck in between // lesbian story

32.

Athena's POV

Today is the day I have to make the big decision.

The thought of hurting either of them makes my stomach twist. I can't even make a decision.

I'm going to lose one of them and I hate the idea of that.

Not because i can't commit to one person or that I like having my options opened but it's because I genuinely like talking to them and they both bring out a good side of me.

We've bonded so well the past few months and I'm here ready to break my own heart with the decision that I'm going to make.

And no, I haven't actually settled on a decision.

But I want to get done with this today because we're all going to be at the same place which will make it easier for me to decide.

I feel like I do better at deciding when I'm under pressure.

"I don't think I wanna go anymore" I said turning to look at Fran who was laying on my bed as I was getting ready "bitch I am going to punch you so hard. You're making me nervous with you please stop"

Kennedy hugged me from behind for comfort and looked at me through the mirror "maybe when you choose Victoria, Natalie will be more understanding and still be your friend-" I cut her off "stop brainwashing me into choosing Vic just because you think she's hot" I said letting out a laugh.

"She is hot, a bit toxic too" Kennedy bit the tip of her finger in a sexy sarcastic way making us laugh "okay okay I'm gonna go now"

Natalie's POV

I am so anxious right now.

I know Athena is going to be choosing between Victoria and I tonight which is scaring me so much.

She has become a huge part of my life and I can't imagine what my life would be like if I lost her.

I was standing next to the bar at the club we were at, drinking a little in hopes of calming myself down which was not working at all.

I placed my hands on the side of my head and let out a deep breathe as I tried to control my emotions and my breathing.

Never in my life have I thought a person could affect me this much.

I turned around in my chair, looking around the club then I spotted Athena who I'm guessing didn't see me.

But she saw Victoria.

She went towards her and held her hand to get her attention since she was talking to some people. Athena said something to her and they interlocked their fingers, walking out of the club hand in hand.

My fucking heart aches.

I've done literally everything in my power to make Athena see how good I can treat her and she goes to choose the cold blooded bitch that fought with her all the time?

I am so enraged and so furious.

Is she even going to talk to me about it or just leave me without a goddamn explanation?

Should I go interrupt them or something?

Maybe Athena will see how I'm the better option and not that fucking asshole.

Fucking Victoria.

Getting everything she wants by being emotionless, a bitch and depressed all the fucking time.

I've never seen emotions on that woman's face and Athena is choosing to live with that as if it's all fun and games?

God I hope Victoria walks through that door right now so I can punch her so hard.

And how could Athena do this to me? After telling me how good I make her feel, how gentle I am -which I'm sure Victoria isn't- and how I'm so perfect.

Then she goes and does shit like this.

A few minutes later, Athena walked in and I stood straight up as her eyes landed on me.

I went towards her and she tried walking the opposite way but I held her arm and turned her around to see that she was crying "not now Natalie" she pulled her arm back and walked towards the bathroom.

If it caused her this much pain then why did she do it?

Victoria's POV

I watched as Athena stepped inside of the club and I just stood there, trying to act like the amount of pain I'm feeling right now isn't killing me.

I sat down on the floor and pulled a cigarette out of my pocket, placing it in between my lips and lighting it as a few tears rolled down my face.

//

"You okay?" I asked Athena who seemed nervous. I can hear my heart pounding in my chest "I don't know how to do this"

I reached out to hold her hand and rubbed it softly "it's okay, talk to me" I reassured making her finally look into my eyes. I wiped away the tear that slipped out of her eye and waited patiently for her to say what she wanted to say.

"I think it's time for me to choose between you and Nat.." expected but still scary "..I don't- I can't do this"

Then realization hit me. So hard.

I pulled my hand away from her and let out a breathe, trying my best not to cry in front of her.

"I know what you wanna say, Athena" I said wiping away the tear that rolled down my cheek. She looked down as she anxiously played with her fingers "I'm sorry" she apologized.

I looked to the side and tried to gain my strength back. I feel so weak and helpless right now.

I forced a smile on my face and looked back at Athena "it's okay, I understand. She's good for you" I'm better for you but it's too late now.

Athena closed her eyes "I'm so sorry, Vic. I didn't want to hurt you-" I cut her off and shook my head "it's okay. I know this is hurting you too so relax, all the stress is over now"

I leaned closer to her face and kissed her cheek "we'll stay in touch" I said and she nodded, smiling weakly at me "yeah"

//

More and more tears rolled down my face as I remembered our conversation a few minutes ago.

I can't even enjoy my cigarette.

My heart stings, my body feels weak, my stomach is twisted and aching.

I should've put more effort to make her see how good I can be for her but I didn't.

I didn't do that because of my stupid fear of being vulnerable with people because I think they're going to eventually hurt me.

Why does this all have to be so painful?

Why can't the pain just go away?

My phone was buzzing and I wanted to ignore it but it was buzzing too much so I pulled it out of my pocket and checked it.

"What the fuck?"