Mr. Holt

Adele and Josie

When we get back to his cabin, I ask him again about the woman.

"Alexander, who was that woman?" I say as he and I are changing out of the ski clothes.

Instead of answering me, he says, "Do you want to relax in the spa for a little while?"

"Lex, tell me who she is and why you were giving her money."

"Fine," he says and stands facing me with his hands on his hips. I admit I'm distracted by his shirtless body and the V-line to his boxers which is tempting me to want more.

"I met a woman when I opened this ski resort 8 years ago," he says.

"Oh. So why were you giving her money? Are you still involved?"

"No. Nothing like that."

"Do you love her?" I ask, backing away from him as I place my hand on my forehead and feel very overwhelmed. I know I should've protected my heart.

"I have a little daughter."

My head snaps in his direction and my eyes are wide with surprise. "You...what?"

"I have a daughter. She's 8 years old. Her name is Adele."

I stay quiet for a few moments as I digest his words.

"Say something," he says.

"Do you see her?" I ask.

"Sometimes. I mostly just help out her mother. She needs money and since I have money, I give it to her."

I shrug and nod. "Why didn't you tell me before now that you have a child?"

"Savannah, look, I have a history. I won't deny that. But I really like you and I don't want what I did or was involved in before you to affect our relationship."

"But it will," I say.

He nods. "I know. I figured it would." After pacing for a few minutes and running his hand through his hair, he says, "I don't want this to change anything. Though I know it might. I don't have any custody of her."

"Why not?"

"Her mother does. Look, her mother was just a one-night, er, weekend thing for me. I never planned on seeing her again."

"What's her name?"

He looks up at me. "Whose?"

"The mother."

"Josie."

"She's very beautiful," I say.

"Savannah, stop worrying about this," he says and walks out of the bedroom.

I wait a few minutes, thinking about the woman, the child, and why he didn't tell me before now, and then I follow him downstairs and see him in the spa with his head relaxed back on a towel and his arms stretched out wide.

"Join me," he says.

I take off my robe and step in, his eyes on my body as I step into the water.

"What's on your mind," he says and moves over to me.

"I'm worried that you had planned for that woman to be the same as me and then a child mucked it up."

He holds my face in his hands, kissing me as he says, "No."

His hands descend my body and I say, "I just wish I knew for sure."

"You do. You can know for sure," he says and shifts my body onto his lap.
After a few minutes of kissing, I pull away and ask, "How can I know for sure?"
He holds my face in his hands and says, "I haven't asked anyone else to sign it."
"Oh. Then why me?"
He pulls my hips against him as our kissing grows more passionate and he says, "Because you're worth it."

We leave to go back home the next morning and I'm pretty quiet the whole trip. I can't stop thinking about what other lives he might be living or what other secrets he might be keeping. When he drops me off at my apartment that evening, I think about just saying goodbye. Not for the night, but for good.

"Thanks for the trip. It was lovely," I say.

"You are so very welcome," he says. "Um, when can I see you again?"

I shrug. "I'm gonna be busy for a while because I have my performance coming up."

"Right. When is that again?"

"In two weeks," I say.

"Looking forward to it," he says with a smile and a kiss on my cheek.

I reach my hand out. "Lex."

"Yeah?"

"What do you do for Christmas?"

He smiles and says, "Nothing."

"Don't make plans."

"I won't."