hits different - Taylor Swift and Travis kelce

telling the older kids

-travis pov-

Taylor is sick, really sick. I don't know exactly how to handle this, because who the fuck knows before they are in the middle of this, but I need to figure it out quickly. Thank god it's stage one, the most curable of breast cancer, if nothing else that's a good thing. But it's still cancer and a million things could go wrong. I'll be damned if I let this take her from me, she is mine and I refuse to lose her to illness, no matter how serious that illness is.

And if she wants to marry before treatment I'm certainly not going to stand in her way. I've been dying to call her Mrs. Kelce anyway so you won't see me complaining about that. it won't be a big affair, there is no time for that, but it will be special anyway. We can have a big wedding, the wedding of her dreams when she is better, and we have time to plan it properly.

"We need to tell the kids, sooner rather than later," I tell her as I drive towards their school to pick them up as their day is nearly over for today. I don't want to keep this from them or give them more uncertainty than they already feel. We aren't officially their parents yet, the legal process takes some time, so this could shake them up and make them feel like they might be sent away again. But we have no intention of ever sending them away, they are our kids, and nothing else is acceptable.

"I know. They have been through so much; I don't want to make things worse for them. And they will find out sooner or later anyway so it's good for them to have time to prepare before treatment starts" Taylor says and tightens her hold on my hand that's resting on her thigh.

The next several months are going to be hard on our whole family, but Taylor will take the most of it and I wish I could take the pain on her behalf. I haven't been around someone with cancer before, it's not something I've ever experienced with someone close to me. Taylor has been through this before with her mom, she at least knows what to expect in part, but I'm clueless.

I've spent countless hours reading up on breast cancer and all the parts of it, to try to help me cope. Because I can't fall apart, Taylor needs me to be strong for her. She is the one fighting this killer and I can't fall apart when she has every right to. Not to mention we have four kids that need me to be strong for them as well. When Taylor can't be as present as she has been I need to pick up the stuff she can't, I need to be more present than ever. There is really not much room for me to dwell on the pain this is causing me as well, I don't have time for it. I'm going to do what I can for our little family to stay whole through all of this.

We pick up the kids and make our way home before we ask the kids to settle in the living room with us. The twins are at the park with Hannah, so we have time to tell Elena and Jacob alone. They are older and will understand more of this, and probably have more feelings about it as well. Two-year-old's have a limit on what they understand about this stuff.

"Did we do something wrong?" Elena asks nervously and bites her lip. I shake my head "No, but we need to talk to you two" The girl is always scared of doing something wrong, of being sent back. No surprise there seeing as they have been passed from house to house for years before they came to us.

"I went to the doctor today because I've been having some trouble. And they did a checkup. I have cancer, breast cancer" Taylor tells them and both kid's eyes widen.

"are you going to die too?" Elena asks with trembling hands and Taylor crouches down in front of her. "I sure hope not. It's not that severe, but because of my medical history, they will be thorough in their treatment. I'm in good hands, you don't have to worry."

"Grandma died of cancer," Jacob says after a bit of silence. I take his hand "Want to talk about it?"

"It was the first place we got placed. She wouldn't tell us she was sick, but we understood that something was wrong. Our parents were in prison, but Grandma wanted to take us in. Well, she was sick for a long time and died one night. I went to check on her because we were going to school, but she wouldn't wake up" he says and my heart aches for him. Finding someone dead isn't exactly an easy thing to deal with. It surprises me how easily he says it, but he isn't as emotional as his sister, he has his own way of dealing with things.

"Well, I promise not to lie to you about it. there are no lies in this house. They are going to do surgery in two weeks and then we will go from there with treatment. They think I have a good chance of beating this. I don't want either one of you to be scared on your own, if you have questions come to us. Just because I'm sick doesn't mean I'm not going to be there for you in any way I can. I promise it won't change how we feel about you" Taylor says and gives both kids a long hug.

-Taylors Pov-

Elena looks terrified and I feel so bad that I can't take that pain away. Now learning that they lost their biological grandmother to cancer I feel even more protective over them. They have lost so much in the past; I don't want them to lose someone else as well. I'm not going anywhere; they are stuck with me.

In other news, I tell them that before I start treatment, we want to get married and that makes Elena's eyes light up a little before the darkness snakes their way back in. I want her sparkly excited eyes that I got a glimpse of, not the pain that she is stuck with from the past.

"do you want to come shop for dresses with me? I'm gonna need a white dress" I ask her, and she nods. "you want me to come?"

"of course I want you there. You're my daughter and you're big enough to come to this" The wedding isn't going to be a big affair, but I still want some version of a wedding dress. A low-key one but still a wedding dress. My quick planning in my mind picture us in a church, just my closest friends and family that can make it there and committing myself to this man forever. I need this before I fight this illness, I need to be his on paper as well.

She might not be my daughter on paper yet, only my foster daughter, but the formalities don't change the fact that she feels like she is mine. I love them both just like I love the twins, they belong with us. We have a court date in about a month or so to make the adoption official, at least if things go according to plan. Maybe then she will feel a sense of belonging. It's hard to tell what she is feeling now. She keeps her feelings locked up tight, probably to protect herself. I know the technique all too well, I do it myself all the time. I've gotten better over the years though, better at letting people in. With time I hope she does too, if not for us for her own good. life is easier if you share your worries with others.

****

I've made plenty of calls tonight, to the people I feel I need at our little shotgun wedding. Our immediate family is the most important people to have there, and I had to think hard about who I wanted outside of them, keeping it small is important. We invited a few of Travis's friends, Blake and her family, Selena, and a few other friends of mine. keeping it small isn't easy when you want everyone to be there, but that is what the big wedding will be like, this is just a little one. This is me needing to be Mrs. Kelce before I start the hardest fight of my life.

Thankfully everyone cleared their schedule to come to our little wedding, and that makes me so happy. The fact that I have family and friends who would drop whatever they are doing to come here for a last hurrah before treatment means the world to me. Of course I told them about cancer at the same time, giving them the reasoning behind the impromptu wedding. Needs to say everyone is devastated but explicitly told me that they are there for whatever I need to get through this. I couldn't ask for better friends or family, for a better support system.

"Everyone is coming," I tell Travis as we lay in bed later at night.

"We have good people around us; I didn't doubt that they would be here," he says confidently and pulls me against his naked chest. I take a deep breath and bask in the comfort he gives me. every night I sleep in his arms, I've never slept as well as I do when he holds me.

"I love you so much" I whisper and his arms around me tighten "I love you too. with everything I am"