Mirrored Exile (HS)

thirteen

chapter thirteen - neon moon

Lucy Caddel

Harry paced back and forth in the living room. I'm sitting in a chair watching him. Zayn is leaning against the wall with his arms folded, he's also watching Harry. My hair is messy and mascara is smudged under my eyes. Smoke and ash caused my face to be hidden under a layer of faint gray. I held my head low as Harry finally stopped and looked at me with a look of frustration mixed with worry. I ran my finger through the necklace on my neck, watching him made me anxious for what he was going to say.

"Do you have any idea what could've happened to you?" He finally speaks up. His voice was still at a low tone but there was that slight annoyance behind it. I nodded slowly, not lifting my eyes to his.

"Do you know where that would put me? How that would affect my job?" He begins to raise his voice now.

"I know... I'm sorry Harry." I finally built up the courage to look him in the eye and the moment I saw the look behind his eye, I regretted it. My head was spinning and I couldn't think properly as the feeling of alcohol slurred in my stomach.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He put his hands on his hips. His shirt was creased and dirty. The top few buttons were undone to see his chest and silver cross chain.

"Because you wouldn't have let me go!" I finally snap, my voice cracking from the lump in my throat.

"That's barely a fucking excuse." He palms his head. The anger in him was quite alarming now. The mood of the room instantly changed the moment he raised his voice. I could tell Zayn was a bit on edge too, he sat quietly in the corner.

"Okay again, I am sorry but you need to remember that I can't just be locked up and away from my life. The reason I am doesn't even make sense. I don't have the fucking hard drive anymore." I stand up off the chair. I'm still a little woozy from the drinks so it takes me a moment to gain my balance.

"God damn it, you don't get it." Harry begins to pace the room again. "Why don't you go out again and see if I care!"

I knew he probably didn't care but, the words coming out of his mouth made it hit differently. It's his job to protect me, he doesn't have to care about my life or interests. He simply just doesn't care and that's the way it will stay.

The bottled-up anger I had with intoxication was now pouring out into words. "I don't get it. You can't yell at me when you made plans to do the exact same thing to me, lie about it, and then say I don't get it."

"What the hell do you mean?" He stopped and narrowed his eyebrows.

"Found anyone to cover your Saturday shift?" I said with frustration in my voice. I caught a glimpse of Harry standing frozen now. He looked confused but he knew exactly what I meant.

I stormed down the hallway to the room. I was in desperate need of a shower. I searched my bag for clothes. Black sweats and a blue T-shirt. I rushed into the bathroom and turned on the water. The smoke-covered, navy dress that belonged to Diarra, pooled on the floor after I unzipped it. Stepping into the shower, the hot water was a relief on my skin. Washing off the gray ash was like washing out the remorse and anger I had felt. Harry had quite the nerve to be yelling about me for the same thing he was going to do.

I finished the shower by scrubbing off the things I had written on my hand today. The black ink fades with the pink soap. My eyes were stinging from the smudged mascara as I washed them with water. I stepped out of the shower and dried myself before I put my clothes on. I made sure to leave the bathroom as I found it, in a clean state. I walked across the hall quietly as the lights were now all off.