Friday was super scary for me and y'all know why I'm trying my best to get over it..... but it's hard today was crappy so I went over to my grandmas house since my uncle was in town for my birthday and we played a game called forever home and I was not good at it I would mess up every time and when it was my turn I felt like everyone was just looking at me and waiting for me to do something and I don't like that so I got anxious and I hid my emotions since I didn't want to show them
And today they asked me if I wanted to play it again and I immediately said no and I didn't say why.... And there was another game that I did not wanna play I don't remember the name but it was taking FOREVER to finish and I was getting Anxious and wanting to go home since it was raining and I was mentally exhausted and needed rest and I told my mom I wanna go home and my grandma was like "in a little bit just sit down" and I sat down and I sat there for about 3 hours of so until my mom said "you can walk home if you want" and as I was about to leave my mom stopped me and was gonna call my dad to come get me and I groaned annoyed with her and I sat down by the stair case and looked at the sun on the drive way because I had nothing better to do and I was anxious and I felt shaky so I didn't want my grandma, uncle, my mom, or anybody worrying so I faked a smile and hid my pain like I always do
Faking a smile is easy for me now since I've gotten so used to it and I'm fine with it since it helps my family worry less about me.