Control The Uncontrollable // The Acolyte

66. Padawans

"Really, Stun Cuffs?" Qimir mumbled displeased, in the back seats.

You blatantly ignored him. Taking him with you here was not out of trust, but rather the complete opposite. If you couldn't trust him, you wanted him close. Not only that, but you wanted him far from his Master. You needed to ensure their distance. You were not sure about what to do with him when you would arrive. Qimir couldn't know what you were searching for or who you would meet. The force knows why he wanted it in the first place.

"This is going to be a long road if you're going to be silent the whole way... what is it, 8 hours?" Qimir tried to get under your skin, and sadly it finally worked. You put the ship in auto and turned around, facing him.

"If you think I am taking you with me out of kindness you're madder than what I thought," you told him with your strict Jedi tone, Qimir had grown fond of it.

"So why are you taking me, Y/n?" A smirk grew with his dismissing tone, tilting his head.

You inhaled.

"I do not trust you wouldn't run back scared to your Master," You could play the same game as him.

You turned around and took control back of the ship. The distraction of the stars were soothing. Made you feel at peace. The galaxy would always show you their true intention, how the force was supposed to be seen. The stars were another example of the balance between the light and the dark. The stars would never shine as bright without the dark, yet people tended to ignore the beauty of the darkness.

"Tell me Y/n, after all of this, how are you just going to walk right back in to the order... like it's nothing," Qimir stated.

You smiled weakly, he should've known the answer by now.

"I know what I did was sick, and unforgivable, but you know... what we have...it was something, we could've been happy, far away from both sides..." He continued. You took a deep breath.

"Qimir, my loyalty is not to a side, it's to the light," you stared at the skies as you entered hyperspace.

You leaned back, crossing your arms.

"The light operates within the order, and it's where I operate," You were at peace. Conversations like these did not scare you. They reminded you of the discussion you would have at the temple. Being questioned was not unusual for you. If it was Master Gios, Grand Master Yoda or even you and Yord's conversations. You smiled weakly at the memory. The two of you used to sit up at night, brushing each other's hands, taking up the biggest questions the galaxy could bring to two padawan's.

"They will never change," Qimir grunted.

"You sound like Yord," You laughed low.

"He always believed I should've played by the Order's book... I would get further," You smiled weakly.

"But if I do so... 'play by their book', how many other's Qimir will the Order let down?" You questioned.

"I don't do it for you, or for me... I do it for the future 'us'," you slowly turned around, and faced him.

"It's not about changing the order, I do not need to change them, I want to, but's not the important part for me," You shook your head.

"I want to be the change, that young Qimir or I would've needed, that's all that matters," you smiled.

Qimir swallowed. He couldn't help but feel taken back by your words. He would've lied if he didn't admit that it meant something. He could feel himself weighing him down. A guilt growing. Watching you were all consuming. When he saw you with your former padawan, he had thought what a difference it could've been if he had someone like you. Someone patient, loving and understanding. Perhaps more importantly, not afraid to question the unknown.

He leaned back in his seat. He was speechless. His hatred had blinded him from all the nuances that existed. You were opening his eyes. He looked out into the light. He once used to adore it. Every time him and Master Vernestra would go out on mission, he would sit at the front, staring out the window, taking in the light. It used to be his happy place. Slowly, he stood up and walked over to the seat beside you, sitting down in the front. His eyes staring into the light, just like the old times.

You looked over at Qimir, his eyes gazing at the lights. He seemed to be at peace. A feeling you hadn't truly felt over him in a long time. It was always something else lurking behind. You knew it, but chose to ignore it, because you were in love. You swallowed low, and closed your eyes. Qimir find peace in the light, but you found peace in the darkness.

"Master Sol use to make fun of me when I was little," You humored quietly.

"I use to always fall asleep when we went into light speed," you laughed low.

"I was the opposite, I used to stare into the light," Qimir smiled weakly looking over at you.

You opened up your eyes and looked over at Qimir. It was the first time he had opened up about his time as a padawan. You tilted your head, peace suited his face. It was a purity to it, an addictive quietness. Still, you were awfully aware that simply understanding him, didn't change his past actions. You looked forward, into the light.

"I used to say that the light blinded me," You smiled, before you closed your eyes.

"But I don't think it was the light," You shook your head.

"Love... Love blinded me," You whispered.