Control The Uncontrollable // The Acolyte

83. The Pen

"It would make more sense for him to move to a forest planet, it has more life..." Qimir slowed down as he noticed he had lost your attention.

You were drifting off to a far of place. Qimir could only imagine where your mind was going. Something had happened the last couple of days. You had been more distant, more away. Your body were physically here, but your mind hadn't been present. At times, Qimir feared that you didn't think he noticed. Just because he couldn't read your mind, didn't mean he didn't understand you, that he didn't see you. Worst of all, he feared you didn't think he cared.

It had been a rough transition, Qimir was more than well aware of his lack of growth. He was behind what you wanted, and what The Order wanted. Somehow, he was more worried about the latter than the first. He knew he got your heart, but he sure as hell didn't have The Order's trust. That was on him, and that was dangerous. At any point they could turn their back on him, but unlike when he was a teenager, he had only himself to blame. He was an experiment in their eyes, you were the scientist and the result... wasn't promising.

"Hey, are you okay?" Qimir asked, studying your sudden movement's as he burst your bubbles.

"Yeah, but I would like to go to my room to mediate," It sounded like an excuse, but Qimir was on this whole journey of trying to respect you, without questioning your intentions.

He watched as you stood up, he gave you a slight nod, before you began to walk off. Why did he feel anxious? It was uncomfortable. He began playing with his hands, trying to calm his thoughts. He knew this was the old him, you tried to train him to not worry, but he did. His eyes bore into the movements of his hands. Qimir couldn't take it anymore. He stood up and began to immediately began to rush towards your chambers. This had always been bugging Qimir, how fast you were. It was unlike all the Jedi he had met. Luckily for him, he was able to catch you a second before you were about to walk around the corner to your chambers.

"Something is bugging you," Qimir said.

"Is that a question?" You asked, not displaying any emotions on your face.

"A statement," Qimir was being bold.

You laughed low, causing him to frown.

"You do not know my emotions," Your voice was clear, as your eyes fell upon his hand wrapped around your arm. Qimir removed it, understanding you didn't want to be seen publicly with physical touch.

"My love, we are engaged. I know you," The corner of his lip raised a little as he whispered the unspoken word. None of you had spoken about it. Truly, the two of you had spoken little, about anything personal. He could see how your shoulders were lifting, how reluctant you were.

"I need to mediate," You ignored his words in response, beginning to walk off when Qimir grabbed your wrist again, turning you back. You looked up at him, shocked.

"Let me go in with you," He whispered.

Your eyes grew by his request.