Illicit Love

Kabanata 22

Death is the most frightening event in our lives, how will you overcome if this thing happened?

Death occurs when all biological functions that keep a living creature alive cease to operate. It is an unavoidable aspect of existence. There is no way to defeat death. People dies in every single day on this sphere with different reasons, you can't stop death.

Although death is unavoidable, there are strategies to deal with the loss of a loved one. Don't try to repress your emotions, instead, give yourself permission to mourn. But how will you mourn when it's too painful to cope up everything? Will you seek help by speaking with your love ones? Niether to your best of friends? But even the best therapist can't help you when you're not trying to cope with it.

They said recalling those enjoyable memories you have with your love one's will help you, but guess what? Recalling those memories can't help you concentrate to move forward and live your life, it gives you more and more pain while reminiscing it.

Considering how their life when they still with you can affect you and other people, and trying to find significance in it. Will you do something in their honor that would have held special value for them?

How will you heal a broken heart? Crying? Moving on? Or will you stay on your dark nights and keep chasing it? I don't even know.

"Ma'am your meeting will start in a minute now"

I blink as I heared my secretary called me, I have in my deep thoughts again. Thinkin' by those memories bring back the fresh pain and hatred that I'm trying to bury in the past.

"Sure, tell them to start even without me. I'll follow" I utter before standing up and walked closer to the window view of the vast ocean of different structures towering buildings here in New York City.

It has been a while since that awful day transpired, I can still pictured those memories of that day. I'm still in pain, just by thinking those memories of yesterday. I've grown better and I can say that I'm different from the way I am before, I moved on from my anguish past. But I never been healed, the pain is still in there. Yes I moved on from what happened, I tried to forget everything. But the pain? It stayed there, and no plans to leave me alone.

There's a big hole in my soul, and no one can fill it even my success in life can't. I have everything now, but still I can't say that I am very full succcessed in life . There's still missing deep inside of me, I don't know what it is.

I took a deep breath as I turned my back and starts to walk, as I go out on my office I see some of employees busy doing their works. Some of them are greeting me, I didn't greet back and just nod at them. My usual thing everytime this moment comes, works and personal matters are different.

"This is the plan I'm trying to proposed, we'll be targeting those–" she stopped when she see me approaching in.

"Go on, don't stop" I coldly say, her cheeks tint in rosy as she avert her eyes while nooding her head slowly.

"Good day, President" one of the board member greeted me, he's smiling ear to ear as I gazed him.

I simply nod at him, "Morning, Mr. Adams" I simply said that made his smile grew.

What a boy, I just avert my gazed at him and just listen to the gal who's intently explaining her bright plans. She's the new head manager of marketing department, I was the one who hired her 2 years ago when she graduted as magna cum laude on her graduation.

"That's all ladies and gentleman, thank you for listening" Wanda said in the end of her presentation.

I didn't regret hiring her on that position, she's really great on her works and ideas.