The Life I Want to Live ~Sequel to On The Run~

Chapter 33

"Just have a seat in whichever chair you'd like." Harry said as he gestured towards the seats in front of his desk and sat down behind it himself.

"Uh so I know I called you down here for a chat, so I'm just wondering how you'd like to go about it. Do you want me to explain everything or would you like to ask questions?" He asked me as he fumbled around with papers on his desk.

"I'm ready to hear anything you're willing to tell me. So explain away." I said as I crossed my arms and leaned back into my chair.

"Is there anything you'd like me to explain first? I mean I have a couple of things written down that I'm going to make sure to say but-" He said as he tapped on a notepad on his desk.

"Tell me about your life before you were in a gang." I said as his eyes went wide.

"Oh ok wasn't expecting that but-"

"You think you're the only who prepared for this? Think again." I said as I pulled a note out of the pocket in my jeans and opened it up. "The floor is still yours."

"Uh-well, I lived with my mom and dad in Cheshire, and they got a divorce when I was very young."

"What're their names?" I asked as I looked down at my sheet of paper.

"Des and Anne." He said as I nodded signaling he could continue.

"Once they divorced, my mother and I moved to London where we stayed until I moved out of the house at age 18. Of course that was when I started getting into drugs and alcohol and all of that."

"Why'd you get into it?" He sighed in response.

"I guess I was bored. All I ever did was go to school and come home while my mom worked her ass off all day. She wouldn't let me get a job because she didn't want me to be the provider for the family so I had nothing else to do." He huffed as he scratched something off his list.

"When did you meet the boys?"

"Quite shortly after I moved out. Found them in an alley way next to a club and when we were all shorted money from the same guy we went and ganged up on him. Trusted each other since then."

"Did you ever have a girlfriend?" I asked curiously even though it wasn't on my list.

"Nope." He replied making me twist my face in confusion.

"But I thought-"

"Those were all one night stands. Or one week stands if you count the ones that kept coming back. You were the first girlfriend I ever had." He said making my breath hitch as I could feel his stare upon me.

"Uh-I-well How'd you get this beautiful home?" I asked a bit shocked from his last statement.

"About 2 years ago when I dropped you off at the police station, my grandfather got in touch with me. He hadn't spoken to my parents for over 10 years and wanted to leave money for our family in his will. Little did I know that when I signed off on it I would inherit this house and all of his life savings." He said as he scratched another thing off his list and circled one more.

"That leads me to the only question I have for you." He said quietly as I looked up at him, "Did you say anything to the police about me when I dropped you off? Wait, that was a stupid way to put it of course you did-"

"No." I said as I shook my head.

"What-No?"

"No." I said shrugging my shoulders.

"You didn't say a fucking thing about me?" He asked incredulously as he set both hands on his desk. "How I've kidnapped you three times or how I left you on the street in Italy or how I-"

"No. Your name never left my lips."

"Why? You don't care that I've beaten you or practically ruined your entire life?"

"You had enough goodness in your heart to let me go. That was a repayment in itself." I said as I crumpled up the note in my hand and threw it in the trash beneath his feet.

"So what could you have told them?" He asked as he ran his fingers through his hair obviously flustered by the entire conversation. "And how could they have believed you?" He asked incredulously.

"Told them Ryan kidnapped me and held me in his house for three weeks before I finally escaped and ran to the station. He's in prison for 30 years now with his past records and murders." I said as Harry stared at me like he'd seen a ghost.

"I know you read my list that I made in the hotel." I said changing the subject after a few moments of silence.

"Fuck Madeline I have it right here. I read it every day." He said as he pulled it out from his desk drawer and flipped it on the table.

"Why?! I was going to throw it out but you got it before I could! Throw it out right now!" I demanded.

"Are you out of your mind? This piece of paper has put a burden on me, a burden I deserved and still do. Why in the hell would you want me to throw it out?! I finally realize what I've done to you and I can't stop thinking about it!"

"Harry I'm done with the past and you should be too. You told me to come down here so we could both get closure and if you keep this note and read it every day you'll never have it. That's not the life I want you to live."

"But it's the life I'm destined to live."

"Uh Excuse me sir, Madeline, dinner is served."

A/N: ok so perfect music video is out but where is the one for infinity yo