The Insanity Of Losing You (boyxboy) {Book One of the Insanity Of... Series}

Chapter 23

Ani and I decided to hang out on Sunday. He invited Zach along too because he hadn't hung out with both of us before. We all went to the diner talking and spent our time eating fries and giggled.

Zach gave me a kiss on the cheek and I giggled.

Ani threw French fries at us. "Will you two stop? You're making me feel like a third wheel!"

"That's what you get for wanting to hang out with both of us." I ate one of the fries with a smile.

"Lane, I think it's obvious why Ani wanted to see the both of us." Zach paused for dramatic effect. "There's no denying it, he wants a threesome."

We all laughed.

"Maybe one day when I actually have a dick to fuck you both with." Ani shrugged.

"Dildos are always appreciated."

"No."

"Virgin."

"Whore."

"Okay, don't kill each other. We're not having sex anytime soon."

"I can't even flirt with a guy without him throwing up." Ani said. "And there's no way I'd have sex with you losers. So I guess I'll stay a virgin for now."

"Don't worry, when you have a flat chest and a dick, all of the boys will be lining up to be with you." I said.

"Who would want to be with a tranny like me? They all think I'm filled with some disease."

"You'll find the right guy. You just need to keep looking and eventually you'll find the right one. I did."

"Aww, babe." Zach said and kissed me.

The waitress cleared her throat in the middle of our kiss. She handed us the bill even though we weren't done eating. "We don't tolerate homos here. It makes the customers uncomfortable. So I suggest you pay and get out of here."

"I'll pay, guys. Wait for me in the car."

Zach and I walked outside. He looked aggravated.

"Why should it matter if a boy kisses another boy? There's no difference. If I want to kiss you then I should be able to without dirty looks and death threats."

"That's just the way things are. Everyone has the right to have an opinion."

"I know, but it's just fucked up."

I cupped his cheek and kissed him. "Even if everyone in his world was homophobic, they wouldn't matter. All that matters is that I'm in love with you."

"I love you too."

"Come on, let's get home."

.       .       .

"You really love books, don't you?" Zach said as he looked through my bookshelf.

"Yeah, I've been an avid reader since I was a kid." I said.

He opened my copy of The Perks of Being A Wallflower and took the piece of paper out. And that single piece of paper just happened to be my suicide note.

"Lane... You're suicidal?" Zach asked in a shaky voice.

"Baby, I'm sorry. You shouldn't have read that."

"How long has this been going on for?"

"Almost a year. I put make-up so no one can see them. Zach, I'm sorry that I lied to you."

He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my lips. "Please tell me when you feel this way. I've been through it before and I know the feeling."

"Baby, it's okay. I'm okay."

"I'll make you feel beautiful again." He kissed me for a while.

We on my bed and talked for a while, kissing here and there. He lit a cigarette and started smoking in the middle of our conversation.

"My parents would say that you are such a bad influence on me if they knew the real you."

"Who says I'm not? I am the one who got you high and helped you discover what gay sex is."

"They'd lock me in my room in fear that I'd run off to Mexico with you."

"I guess we'll need to learn Spanish first because I took French."

"Then we'll go to France. We'll drink wine all day and fuck in a bedroom that has a great view of Paris."

"Je t' aime." He said and kissed my lips.

My door swung open and I looked over at my brother who was in complete shock.

"Oh my god." He said and then shut the door.

"Stay here." I said to Zach and walked downstairs.

I raced down the steps to find my brother in distress.

"Nathan, I can explain." I said.

"Explain what? The fact that my brother is a faggot!?"

"Yeah, I'm gay, but that doesn't mean you can call me that!"

"Have you been fucking him this whole time? All these nights he's been over, he's been putting his dick into you?"

"Leave Zach out of this."

"Fine, but you're dead when Mom and Dad get home."