The Insanity Of Losing You (boyxboy) {Book One of the Insanity Of... Series}

Chapter 39

If you hadn't noticed, there isn't a chapter 38. No need to worry, I didn't screw up. That chapter contained mature content and is on private. If you want to read it then you'll need to follow me and then re add the story to your library. If you don't want to read it then that's okay, there aren't any major scenes in that chapter so just read this one. Happy reading :)

I couldn't take it anymore. Just living was killing me enough. I had to take the pills. I just had to. I was worthless. I shouldn't' have been living.

Every inch of my room was torn apart. Papers from my desk were scattered on my floor along with clothes I had ripped out from my drawers. Books were in various places along the walls and near my bed.

I sat in my boxers with my back against the door as tears flooded down my cheeks. The bottle of pills was held by my shaky hand as I popped the cap off.

My phone buzzed on the floor next to me, distracting me from the pills. Sam had sent me a text.

Hey babe, what's up? I love you!!!!!

Without thinking, I pressed the call button and put the phone to my ear.

"Hello?" Sam answered.

"Sammy?" I called out with a sniffle.

"Lane? What's wrong? You sound like you're crying." His heart was breaking just by his tone.

"Oh just your usual every day suicidal thoughts."

"L-Lane, please don't do this."

"I can't live like this anymore, Sammy. This world just hates me and everyone hates me and you hate me. No one wants me in this world. They wouldn't care if I died. You wouldn't either."

"Lane, I'm on my way to your house now. I'm going to keep talking to you until I get there."

"What's the point of life, Sam?" I cried into the phone. "To get spit on and shoved and called a fag and have to take it and have no one else care and just give you busy work to do so you can go to college marry someone of the opposite sex and fucking hate your life!? What's the point of doing that when you can just swallow a bunch of pills and get out? Huh."

"Lane, baby, I love you so much. Please calm down, I'm almost there." He pleaded.

"WHAT'S THE FUCKING POINT, SAM!? ALL THEY WANT IS FOR ME TO SUFFER!"

He was silent on the other end.

"You know what? I'm going to take these fucking pills and show this world that I am not just another one of their drones. Goodbye, Sam." I hung up.

I got up and sat on my bed, then pouring the pills out of the bottle. But I heard rushing footsteps down the hallway. The door swung open making me drop the pills.

A pair of arms wrapped around me but I still felt numb. I could see Sam's mouth moving but I couldn't hear the words. I couldn't even feel his sweet touch when he took my hand and brought me to his car to get me away from the hell I was living.

.     .     .

My eyes fluttered open and I immediately noticed that I was in someone else's room. I was in my boxers and freezing my ass off.

I sat up and glanced around the room to find Sam at his desk with his head down.

I scraped my head in confusion. "How long have I been asleep?"

"A couple hours." He said though it was muffled.

"What the hell happened to me?"

He looked up at me with puffy read eyes. "You almost tried to kill yourself, Lane. Not to mention you scared the living shit out of me."