Maybe It Can Be Real

Chapter 37

Ending of last chapter:

This is real. It's not a dream. It's beautiful. I'm actually going to marry Peeta, and we're both ready - and want - to do it. And it'll be real. It won't be to convince Snow, or to please the Districts, it will be because we're both madly in love with the other.

And that's what truly makes it beautiful.

****

Do you ever have those moments where life just doesn't feel real? You're doing normal, everyday things, but it all feels like a dream? Maybe you're even looking at what you're doing but it's like you're looking through someone else's eyes? That's exactly how I feel right now.

I've been staring at my ring finger for a while now. I just can't really process the fact that Peeta and I are going to get married. It took me by surprise. I wasn't expecting him to propose at all. Then again, I never expected myself to say yes to anyone proposing to me. I'm incredibly stubborn, I know that, so it's a miracle, really, that I said yes. There were too many bad things that could happen if you loved someone when I was growing up, so I vowed to never get married or have children. But, as you can see, the first one won't work out. I do plan to keep the latter true, though.

Love is a... a beautifully dangerous thing. Beautiful because it's strong. Dangerous because it's also fragile. It will either make you or break you. Most of the time you end up trying to sew the pieces of your broken heart back together all by yourself.

My mind wanders from those thoughts when I hear Peeta's uneven footsteps coming toward the room. "So I take it you like your ring?", Peeta asks with a small chuckle.

I smile softly. "Yeah. I love it," I whisper.

He presses his lips against my forehead. "I'm glad you like it," he mumbles.

I grab his chin and bring his lips to mine for a quick kiss. Not a long one, just enough to quickly convey how I feel about him. We don't need to say I love you to show that we love the other. It's simple gestures like a little kiss, or doing something sweet for the other that shows how much you love them.

We've helped each other through many flashbacks and nightmares. Which definitely shows the love we have for each other. Regardless of what could be said, those actions prove the love that is so obviously there.

This may sound strange, especially coming from me, but I love kissing him. I really do. It's a wonderful feeling that I honestly can't go long without. It just.... I dunno it helps ground me in reality when I'm having a flashback or in the aftereffects of a nightmare. I'd probably go crazy if I couldn't kiss him for an extended period of time.

"When should we tell people about the engagement?", Peeta asks.

I rest my head on his shoulder and reply. "I'm not really sure. Soon though, I guess. Like, I wanna keep it secret for a time because I'm sure the nation would explode at the news or something, but people have the right to know."

"We don't have to tell the country. We can just keep it to family and friends," he points out.

"I know, I wish we could keep it like that, but I'm sure the news would get leaked somehow and then it'd be on the news, or something. And I don't want that. I'd like to keep it private," I respond bitterly.

He rubs my arm. "We don't have to tell people for a while if you don't want. Or at all, really."

I sigh. "No, I know we need to tell people. I doubt any of our friends and family would go and tell everyone about it."