Maybe It Can Be Real

Chapter 62

Ending of last chapter:

Picking up our mugs, I hand him his and say, "Cheers." We clink glasses and spend the rest of the day fantasizing about what our child will be like when he or she arrives in a few short months. It scares me, but it also excites me in a way that I never thought was possible. Maybe having a child won't be so bad.

****

Peeta had asked me if I wanted him to accompany me while I went hunting, but I told him no. I could tell that he was nervous about me going alone, but he didn't want to be overprotective of me, so he let me go, thankfully - I love that man, but gracious, he is loud in the woods. He would scare away the game. Granted, he's gotten much better at it over the years, but he just doesn't have a knack for it, like I did. Which is fine, too. I can't bake or paint to save my life.

I also just want to be alone to think and gather myself together in the woods, with the smell of the pine trees in my nose and the feel of the soft earth beneath my feet. I've felt like I've just come undone the past few weeks. The pregnancy has taken a toll on me, I can tell. I'm not the same as I was before, and I don't think I'll ever be that person again. I'm much more paranoid now, always thinking that something is going to come to hurt my child. I find myself resting my hand on my swollen stomach almost all day. It's just natural.

I'm also taking care of myself, and Peeta, more. With it being five months into the pregnancy, the morning sickness has finally stopped, so I'm able to do much more, hence my trip to the woods today. I get up around seven in the morning rather then nine to start my day earlier. To keep myself busy, I do the dishes everyday, and I do the laundry every couple of days. I prepare what I can for meals, keeping it in the fridge until Peeta needs it. In a sense, I'm trying to train myself to be more motherly for our child. I don't know if it's working, but I'm trying. That's all that can be asked of me, right?

I gently grab an arrow from my quiver and notch it, pulling the string back close to my face. When it is aimed at the squirrel, I take a deep breath and let it fly. Picking up the squirrel from the ground, I pull the arrow out and then tie the tail to my belt, where other squirrels are hanging. Seven squirrels should get me a decent price from the butcher. I mean, I hit them right in the eye, just like people prefer.

Taking a deep breath, the chilly air waking me up, I start my trek back to the district.

****

Pocketing the coins that the butcher gave me, I thank her, but as I turn away, she stops me.

"Excuse me, Mrs. Mellark, but I was wondering if you had a moment to talk," she asks.

Slightly confused, I nod and reply, "Of course."

"Feel free to disregard this," she starts, "but I was wondering if you'd be willing to take up a job here. Despite the new laws that allow us more food, we still don't have a ton of fresh meat, and you of all people know what that's like."

Should I be insulted by that?

"Everyone loves the game that you bring in, myself included. Plus, you're a great hunter, so I figured you could bring in game for a job and make more money than you do now by simply selling it to us," she finishes, sending me a hopeful smile.

"Thank you for the offer," I say, resting my hand on my stomach, "but I'm pregnant, and pretty soon I won't be able to go hunting." Her face falls a bit. Speaking quickly, I say, "But, if it's still okay with you, I'd like to think about this more seriously after I have the baby."

She nods excitedly. "Yes, definitely! Just come back when you're ready to start working - if you even want to, though. Things may change a bit between now and then."