Just Let Me Love You

Thirty - Sudden

Dedicated to one of my most fav authors, Ms. Pat Danao! hart hart po

Beige Crimona Samaniego

Nagising ako ng may narinig akong parang may tumatama sa sliding door ng kwarto ko papuntang balcony. Wala naman akong nakitang tao sa labas pero tuloy pa din yung pagtama ng mga tila bato sa salamin.

Agad akong nainis. Balak niya bang basagin tong pintuan ko? Wrong timing talaga yung ginawa niya dahil bagong gising lang ako. And you wouldn't like me after I just woke up. Tumitibok-tibok pa ulo ko sa kirot ngayon.

Dali dali akong bumangon at padabog na naglakad papunta sa pintuan. Hinawi ko ng bahagya yung kurtina pero wala akong nakitang kahit na ano dun bukod sa mga furnitures soon. Binuksan ko agad ang pinto at may maliit na bato na tumama sakin mula sa kanan ko.

Lumingon ako sa kung saan nang-galing yung bato at nakita si Ice na nakasandal sa railings habang nakapamulsa at nakatingin sa kawalan.

Naghalo-halo yung nararamdaman ko. I was relieved to see him in front of me, still alive after all those hours we didn't know what's happening to each other. I think I missed him after those days that we've been ignoring each other. My hands felt like touching him. My heart was beating extremely fast. I was nervous. I was happy. I was furious. I was confused.

"I-ice!" I gasped.

"Well," he looked at me. "It took quite some pebbles to wake you up."

Agad siyang umayos ng tayo at naglakad papalapit sakin.

May kung ano sakin na nanibago sa pakiramdam na malapit siya sakin. Am I missing his presence?

Nagtuloy-tuloy lang siya sa loob ng kwarto ko. "H-hoy Ice!" I scolded him. "Just what do you think you're doing?" I raised my hand at him.

"Hmm?" He tilted his head sideward. "Entering your room. What else do you think?"

I had to breathe heavily because my heartbeat is just so fast.

"W-what are you doing here?" Nakatungo kong tanong sa kanya. I closed the door behind me.

Nang tignan ko siya, umupo siya sa kama ko at ihiniga ang katawan. "Talk to me," he was staring at the ceiling.

Kingina. Why do I feel so tensed now that he's this close to me? Kapag wala naman, hindi ako mapakali.

"A-anong sasabihin ko b-ba?" Fushang-gala. Nauutal pa ko.

Bumangon siya sa kama at ipinatong ang mga siko sa tuhod. "Anything. How have you been lately? I haven't heard much from you these past few days."

**
Nainis si Crim sa naging tanong ni Ice sa kanya. Pakiramdam niya iniinsulto siya ni Ice sa tanong nito sa kanya.

"I don't know!" She screamed. "You started to distance yourself from me, and then now you'll just barge into my life just because you want to. How do you think would I feel?"

He intertwined his fingers and placed his chin above those. Naningkit ang mata ni Ice sa sinabi ni Crim.

"I distanced myself huh?" Nakatungo niyang tanong kaya hindi makita ni Crim kung ano ang reaksyon ni Ice. "Ako pa ngayon ang umiiwas?" He looked at Crim with a blank expression. He has always been good in hiding what he truly feels by keeping a blank face. Same as Crim. But she just can't afford to control her emotions and expressions if it's anything regarding Ice.

She tried to answer back to look stronger. "O-of course! Ikaw ang umiwas. Why would you think I-i'd try to distance myself from you ha?!" Pautal-utal siya pero malakas parin ang loob niyang sagutin si Ice.

Isinandal ni Ice ang mga kamay niya sa kama saka ipinaling ang ulo sa gilid. "I don't know. Bakit nga ba?" He was teasing her to spill what's on her mind.

Nagulat si Crim sa ginagawa ni Ice. Nangingilid na yung luha niya sa sobrang overwhelmed sa dami ng emosyong nararamdaman niya ng sabay-sabay. Napasandal nalang siya sa glass door dahil sa panghihinang nararanasan niya sa kasalukuyan. Nahihirapan narin siya sa paghinga, at lumalakas ang tulo ng pawis niya kahit na naka-aircon siya.

"Just tell me what you're thinking Crimona," he stood up and walked slowly towards Crim. "I'm dying to know what's happening."

Nang makalapit na siya kay Crim ay hapong-hapo na si Crim. Napatingala siya kay Ice, at pakiramdam niya ay mabibiyak na ang ulo niya sa sobrang kirot. "I-ice.." sambit niya na tila naging isang bulong nalang.

"I'm through with my assumptions. I want to hear it directly from you."

Hindi na kinaya ni Crim ang sama ng pakiramdam niya kaya't natumba siya sa mga bisig ni Ice.

Napangiti si Ice nang maramdaman ang mainit na katawan ni Crim dahil sa lagnat. "Just as I thought," bulong niya sa sarili.

Isinandal niya si Crim sa kanyang dibdib at hinayaang makapagpahinga muna doon sandali. "If that's the case," he said. He raised his hand and soothed Crim's hair and settled his hand on Crim's head. "Let me take care of you this time."

He kissed the top of Crim's head. After a while, he carried Crim to her bed. He snuck her in her covers and immediately switched off her aircon.

He decided to go down and ask for the necessary things for a fever. He paused at the front of her door and looked back at her.

He was staring at her as she breathes heavily, sleeping softly. Napangiti nalang siya sa naging kinahinatnan ng lahat. Naramdaman niya nang hindi maayos ang pakiramdam ni Crim, kaya niya na rin siya pinuntahan ngayon. At para na din kausapin siya.

"Hindi lang talaga kita matiis, no?" He whispered.

He is happy at moment, being able to be this close to Crim again. His worries didn't matter. What he's most delighted of is that he is able to see her again. He is able to hold her again. He has been through hell struggling to fight the urge of just ignoring all the past happenings and just have Crim back; just to take them back to how they used to be. Because he's willing to take all sorts of pain just to have Crim. He's willing to have Crim even if it means getting eternaly hurt. That will never be an issue for him as long as it's for Crim.

He reached their kitchen and saw a maid there. "Uhh, excuse me. Could you please provide me a basin of ice cold water together with a towel. Oh and, do you have fever medicines? I'd also want to prepare a hot porridge for her, so please allow me to use the kitchen for that sole purpose. Thank you."

Nakamaang nalang ang kasambahay nila Crim sa naging sunod sunod na utos ni Ice. "O-opo sir." She sternly said and went to finish her errands.

He started preparing something for Crim. He even wore an apron, to be accurate.

He was busy cooking when Yvan arrived home.

"Ehh?" Napatigil siya nang makita si Ice na nagluluto sa bahay nila. "Ice?" Gulat niyang tanong.

Umiling-iling si Ice. "Apoy talaga pangalan ko."

"What are you doing here?" Pagwawalang bahala niya sa pamimilosopo ni Ice at naupo nalang sa counter.

Tumalikod na uli si Ice para ituloy ang pagluluto. Inilapat ni Ice yung likod ng kamay niya sa leeg niya. "I'll take care of her," he answered.

"I didn't know she was sick," Yvan commented.

"That's because she just got her fever right before you arrive."

Sinumangutan lang ni Yvan si Ice. Napabuntong hininga siya. "Fine, do whatever you want." Pagpaypay niya palayo kay Ice. "Just don't dare take advantage of her now that she's vulnerable." He threatened Ice.

Tumungo lang si Ice. "I would never do such a thing. You have my word."

Tumango-tango lang si Yvan. "Good. Bring some porridge for me in my room if there're some left." Tumayo na siya saka kinuha ang bag at umakyat na para matulog at magpahinga.