I Was, I Am.

-CHAI-SHAI-

EDITED CHAPTER#9

If there was one thing I really loved eating from the office canteen, it was their cheese sandwich. Super unhealthy yes, but delicious.

As I nibbled at my sandwich one of these days, I also quietly watched the others from the team indulging in a rather animated conversation.

"So she's not into you?" asked Veronica. The question had been directed towards the youngest boy in the team, Ishaan.

Ishaan brushed his hand through his hair, taking a sip of his coffee and then shook his head.

"But how can you be so sure when you didn't even tell her what you feel!" Radhika exclaimed at that.

It had been one week since we had started with our training. I would be lying if I said I didn't have my reservations initially, about how I would fit in with people so young and so educated from the best colleges.

But Mihir's assignments seemed to deal with that problem at hand. I had noticed, that for some reason, he enjoyed making groups out of people with the most clashing personalities.

It had seemed rather cruel at first, but by the time we had finished our assignment, we had all realized with a start, that we had actually formed a weird, unspoken bond. Before this assignment, most of us usually kept to ourselves, but for the past two days, everybody had started eating lunch together.

As for a backstory for Ishaan's conversation, it appeared that he had developed a super intense crush on somebody from his college. From what I could gather from bits and pieces in the conversation, she was older than him, but he was rather whipped.

"But I know she doesn't like me!" he whispered softly, almost sinking into his seat. And for one small second, I felt this urge to pat him on the back in consolation.

Feelings can be such a waste of time.

"Oh c'mon!" Radhika put her hands up in surrender.

"Aditi, why aren't you saying anything?" Veronica asked suddenly looking at me through her black rimmed glasses.

I gulped down the last bite of the sandwich I had taken, wondering what to say to her for a reply. It wasn't that I wasn't interested in the conversation, I just...didn't know what to say.

"I...I'm not very experienced in this field."

White lies harmed no one, right?

While no one said anything to that, Ishaan seemed to gaze my way for an extra second too long.

"What?" I asked, feeling rather self aware.

He shook his head quickly, attempting to make it seem like it was not a big deal but it was evident that he itched to say something that instant.

"Oh come on Ishaan, what is it? Say it na." I found myself urge him out of curiosity.

Ishaan looked thoughtful, when he scratched the back of his head and spoke so softly, it required us to strain our ears to listen, "Well, isn't something going on between you and Mihir?"

My whole body flushed with warmth that instant, I was embarassed. I was so embarassed I wanted to run away from the table and never return.

What the hell was I thinking? Agreeing to go out with Mihir? Was I really hoping no one at work would find out?

What would they be thinking about me right now? That I was some kind of a manipulative opportunist, who had weasled her way into this training with no degree because of her seduction skills?

Even the thought made bile rise to my throat, I was uncomfortable with the conversation now.

I bit my lip unknowingly that instant, realizing that despite the discomfort though, I seemed to have another line of thought playing at the back of my head. Somewhere deep down inside, there was a tiny part of me that was most worried about  how far this feaux news had travelled.