I Was, I Am.

-FORGIVEN-

The balcony in my room was a really tiny one with room only for about three people to stand. Given the choice; I wouldn't want to stay in such a place alone with Aakash. But I wanted to ensure that the high pitched conversation didn't reach our ears; and the safest place for that was my balcony.

I could feel Aakash's gaze on me as I pressed my back to the wall opposite to his. My palms rolled into fists at that as I debated mentally for whether I should tell him about Dev or not. There was about two feet of distance between us; but I could feel the awkwardness thick in the air.

I looked out at the society; the park; the parking space; the buildings; everything; in the hope to distract myself; but I couldn't. Considering I could feel him looking at me.

I stole a quick glance at him; only to realize something I'd doubted all these years;

He really cared for me.

I wasn't blind; and I couldn't ignore the love with which he was looking at me. Was it platonic love?

And if it wasn't; it only made me wonder why now? Why now when I had moved on?

Was I honestly that important to him? Why then did he never try to be with me? When I would kill to be with him?

I just had to ease the tension in the air and get a conversation going. I placed a stray chunk of hair behind my ear consciously as I tried to focus on Arjun and Disha. And then I spoke what I'd been thinking for a while;

"How do they even stand each other?"

He seemed to be taken aback at my question; as he asked with confusion;

"They?"

"Arjun and Disha."

"Oh of course; them." He sighed; and I almost sensed disappointment in his tone.

Did he want to talk about...us?

But what was there to talk about anyway? He'd left and I'd moved on. He couldn't possibly ask for a new beginning!

"What about them?" he continued quietly.

"They're married. And marriage is not safe sailing through and through; right? This can't possibly be their first disagreement. And yet she chose to run away." I explained.

His brows knit together as he folded his arms; "But they've always been like this haven't they?"

"Being like this in the dating phase and married phase is two very different things Aakash."

"So what are you trying to say?"

"What I'm trying to say is that this is not how it's supposed to be. We may be best of friends but if we have to involve ourselves for every little disagreement of theirs; it is not normal."

I could tell he was dwelling on that by the way he turned towards the railing of the balcony. His arms rested on the railing as he stared ahead of him; at the twinkling of the numerous lights in the city life.

"Then what should we do as per you?" he asked softly; turning towards me.

I walked towards him as he held my gaze for longer than it ideally should have happened.

"We stay out of it." I stated.

"What?"

"It is their marriage and their decision. All we can do is support them in their times of need Aakash."

"It's been three years of their marriage Adit-"

"-exactly. And three years is a lot of time. This is certainly not how married couples behave. Or should behave anyway."