*IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE THEN DO NOT READ*
ALSO I DON'T MAKE THESE SO DON'T YELL AT ME, I WAS OFFENDED TOO
Aries:you're too fucking dramatic. Stop blowing everything out of proportion. The world doesn't revolve around you.
Taurus:you complain all the fucking time but never change what bothers you. Get your fucking ass up and stop coming up with new excuses.
Gemini:you're so damn mean. Who the fuck hurt you? You lie and talk shit about people the moment they leave the room but expect everyone to be straight up honest with you? This isn't how it works.
Cancer:you're such an unforgiving, petty little crybaby. I'm sorry for what I said three years ago. I apologised a million times. Move the fuck on. You're so damn whiny.
Leo:you're an insensitive fucking prick. You hurt others without even noticing and stomp around on the pieces of their broken hearts cause you, with your big fucking ego, expect everyone to make way for you.
Virgo:you're the devil in an angel's disguise. You lure people in like a siren, learn about their weakness, then ruin them by a calculated plan. You think you're smart cause you know how to play others? You're just being a manipulative asshole.
Libra:your inability to make decisions is so fucking annoying. I'm running out of patience with you. You're so unsure of everything, even of yourself. Stop being so goddamn insecure about who you are and what you want. You're not going to get anywhere in life if you keep relying on what other people tell you to do.
Scorpio:you're too fucking demanding. Greed is one of the seven deadly sins, and yours is never satisfied, which is why there's a special place in hell reserved for you. You always want more and complain when shit doesn't immediately work out for you. Have you ever heard of patience?
Sagittarius:you're so loud, even when you're not talking, but that's rare anyway. You always have to make everything about you and prove your point and make sure you have the last word in an argument. That pisses people off and you don't even realise cause you expect everyone to love you just the way you are. Here's a secret: Some people won't love you the way you are. Learn to accept that.
Capricorn:you can be so motherfucking dull, like the human equivalent to a fucking rock. Generally smart and witty, you seem to be unable to feel empathy most of the time. You bottle everything up and constantly block everyone who tries to be kind to you, then complain about being lonely? Doesn't really make sense, huh?
Aquarius:you're such a self-loathing, dramatic pseudo-deep shit-talker and a walking cliché. Probably a hippie. Probably a hipster that says "I hate hipsters" and an artist that makes fun of other people's art.
Pisces:you're a dependent little baby and a hypochondriac. You're unable to pull yourself together and always create drama to distract people from your flaws which you never admit to have. Also, stop spending so much money wtf
