Complicated Love

Chapter 42: Fast Forward

Nakaupo ako sa harap ni Mommy para lagyan nya na ko ng make-up. This is a special day for me and my family so I should look beautiful. "Light make-up lang ah. Maganda na ko so di na kailangan ng bonggang make-up." I joked. "Lam mo naman,mana sa nanay." Then I winked at her before she started.

Nag-aayos na rin si Daddy kasi ayaw nya daw maging panget sa araw na to. Masyadong pinaghandaan ng pamilya namin kahit na Moving Up lang to dahil dyan sa K-12 na yan. Pero sabi ni Daddy, pareho lang din daw naman yun. Basta ang alam nya,masaya ako at pati na rin sila.

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"Congrats baby Zia!" Kuya Diether greeted on the other line. "Sorry wala ako dyan ha. May pasok ako eh. Babawi naman ako sayo next time! Goodluck sa Senior High life mo. Baby pa rin kita kahit na kahati ko yang Carl na boyfriend mo!"

"Luh." I reacted. "De,joke lang." Then I laughed before I said, "Thank you Kuya! Alam mo namang mahal na mahal kita kahit na lagi tayong magka-away diba?"

"Oh,sige na." He added, "Alam ko namang magkakainan pa kayo eh."

"Okay,bye!"
"Sige." And then I pressed the 'end' button on my phone.

I turned to my parents and hugged them. "We're so proud of you. Continue to impress us,okay? But don't stress yourself too much and don't be pressured. Nandito lang kami ng daddy mo para sayo,ha?" Mom said,I nodded.

They pushed me off as I heard Carl's voice. "Hi,babe." I hugged him so tight that I don't want to let go of him again. "Congrats satin! May Senior High pa,kaya natin yun,diba?"

"Let's enter that stage together,alright?" I said to him before he put his hands around my shoulders.

"Promise ko yan sayo,baby ko." Then he looked down at me,smiling just like how that smile made me label him as my 'crush' back then. Who knows he'll be my boyfriend and now,it's been a year already. Ginulo nya ang buhok ko at nag-lakad na kami papunta sa sasakyan para kumain ng magkasama ang pamilya namin.

After that day,our relationship became stronger as we encountered more arguments,misunderstanding and jealousy. The word 'break up' doesn't count in our dictionary. Even with those problems,we stayes strong even though sometimes,my patience get shorter.

On the other hand,that things made our relationship complicated because there's this point that I can't talk to him very well,I can't forgive him or vice versa,and he's not being moved by how I go to their house whenever we fight.

Kahit minsang wala namang kwenta pinagaawayan namin,hinahayaan nya na lang akong matulog. Ewan ko ba,bigla na lang syang nagbago simula nung linggo ng Moving Up day. Sobrang pagbabago.

Alam kong di naman maiiwasan yun pero bat ganto? Ibang pagbabago yung naganap sakanya at sa relationship namin. Minsan ko na rin syang nasisi dahil bigla na lang syang ganun. Dahil noon,yung mga gantong bagay naman pinapabayaan na lang namin o kaya minsan,pag-uusapan.

Pero ngayon? Ayun. Pag-aawayan namin, magpapaka-cold kami sa isa't isa, di kami mag-uusap kung minsan, at nagkakagalit pa. On-off nga yata ang relasyon namin ngayon eh.

1 week,sweet kami then another week,isang buong linggo naman kaming magka-away. It's almost 4 weeks that we're like this.

Nai-kwento ko na rin to kay Chris at Courtney,na ngayon ay magka-relasyon na, at pati na rin kina Mommy at Daddy.

Di ko alam kung sino ba samin ang tama o mali dahil alam ko naman sa sarili kong ginagawa ko ang lahat para mapatibay yung relasyon namin. Pag ako nagsimula ng away at nag-sorry naman sya,bati agad kami. Pero pag baliktad,kahit lumuhod ako sa harap nya,tuloy pa rin ang galit nua sakin. Di ko talaga sya maintindihan.

Kung sa iba na babae ang abnormal,samin ni Carl,sya ang babae. Nasa kanya lahat ng iniisip ng mga lalaki sa isang babae at ako naman tong perfect boyfriend na nangsusuyo,nanghahalik kapag galit sya,at pupunta ako sa bahay nila para makipag-ayos. Gabi-gabi akong umiiyak.

"Babe?" I messaged him before I go half-asleep. I closed my eyes but tears are falling. I closed my eyes while waiting for my phone to vibrate,hoping that he'll reply. And he did.

"Bakit?" See? Hindi man lang sweet word or something like 'Bakit babe?'. Ibang-iba. Dati ganun sya pero ngayon iba na talaga.

It's already 3am. God knows,my parents know,and Carl knows that I'm supposed to be sleeping at this time. But I've been awake up to this time since something occured in our relationship.

"Diba mahal mo ko?" I replied after a few seconds of hesitating. I added, "Pano mo ko natitiis?"

"Mahal na mahal kita,alam mo yan." He replied to me. I felt haply for a minute but then the pain came back and I started to overthinked.

Pano kung hanggang salita na lang yun? Pano kung sinabi nya lang yun para um-okay pakiramdam ko? Pano kung di naman totoo? Kasi bakit nya ko tatratuhin ng ganto kung mahal na mahal nya naman pala ako? Ewan ko talaga.