Septiplier One Shots

This Isn't A Comedy Club

"Okay, so you want to know about our relationship, huh? Yeah, I think I can do that. Firstly, my name is Seàn, or Jacksepticeye, or Jack, as I'm known by many, William McLoughlin. This guy's name is Mark Edward Fischbach, or Markiplier. I'm not a fangirl, hence why I'm sitting here talking to millions of people about our relationship.

"So to get the elephant out of the room, I know this isn't the right place to talk about this, but Mark," Sean sighed, looking at his husband out of the corner of his eye. He was staring at Sean intently.

"Mark is always making me laugh." Sean stood and moved the stool he was sitting on into a comfortable place. "He's always spurting innuendos, sex jokes, or just terrible puns. But I love him anyways." Sean grabbed for Mark's hand and intertwined their fingers.

"Also, he loves to baby me and treat me like a child, but hey, I like it. He likes it." Sean chuckled. "One time, we were sitting on the couch watching some horror movie and he leans over and goes, 'Hey. Jack.' And started poking me. I asked what was up, and he just stood up, picked me up like his bride, and took me away to cuddle in our recording room. No reason why it was the recording room I guess." Some people in the crowd chuckled.

"Mark is an all around hilarious guy and amazing person. But he's super shy when it comes to serious situations like... Hm, can you name one, babe?" Mark snapped out of his trance and looked down at the audience, up at the ceiling, and finally back at Sean.

"The coming out video?" Mark asked. Sean laughed.

"Oh right! Duh! He was so nervous about telling our fans how we came about to this point. It payed off; like, ninety seven percent of our fans actually supported it, two percent said it was okay and we could do what we wanted, and the other one percent said, 'You know what? You're gay so I'm not gonna subscribe to you anymore.'" Mark nodded, attempting to think of a pun. He couldn't.

"That tore Mark up. It really did. Once he posted the video and waited for the comments, seeing those were the hardest to process. I would tell him it's okay, but he wouldn't believe me. It was like the sky was falling down. I offered to punch some people for him, and he just gave me a laugh. A laugh and a smile. That big, bright, beautiful smile.

"Don't even get me started on his laugh. His smile'll you tear you up enough. I love his laugh, his smile, his eyes, his nose, his hair, I love everything about him. He's so loving and gentle and sweet and goober-ish," Mark's face had gone red.

"Shh, I'm not that great." The crowd in front of the stage began jeering in disagree. "You want to know what's really great? This guy. This guy right here is amazing. His smile when he sees fans like you guys is unforgettable. He inspires me to do so much, to do so many things with my life. He is my life. He's my world. He's my universe. I don't know where I'd be without him." Mark looked Sean dead in the eye. He had small tears trailing down his cheeks as he brought a hand up to cover his mouth. His glasses were becoming fogged.

"S-stop it! You're making me blush!" He whined.

"Alright, I'll stop. Just know you're super adorable and I'll never stop loving you. Come here, goober." Sean stood up and climbed the stool into Mark's lap and settled there. He snuggled into Mark's chest and played with his shirt. The audience went crazy.

"Mark, when is the panel over?" Sean whispered low enough for his microphone not to pick up.

"We're almost done, why?"

"I'm tired. I wanna go home." Mark kissed the green floof on the Irishman's head.

"Okay, baby. Lemme close out and I'll get an escort. Want me to carry you?" Sean nodded. Make stood and let Sean wrap his legs around his waist and arms around his neck.

"Alright everyone, our time is up. I hope you enjoyed this panel! The exit is right behind you and to the left a bit. Remember, Jack and I'll be at a signing tomorrow in the main lobby lasting  eleven to six." A guard walked up on stage and began ushering the boys out as the crowd filed out the exit to the main lobby.

"Did you have fun, Jackie?" Mark whispered against Jack's forehead. He nodded.

"Do you wanna go home and cuddle and watch Disney movies?" He nodded again.