Love Me Again

Prologue

I don't know how much more I could take of this. I used to count down the seconds until I got the chance to go home again, but now I can't wait to escape from the prison that I call my home. I just want to leave and never come back to that place.

Feeling the weight of the house pressing against my chest, I rush out of the house towards the only place I now felt relief in, my workplace. On the way to work though, I felt a weight pressing against me once my thoughts ran to my husband, Blake Daniels.

My mind would not allow me to escape for its cycle of torture on me. It forced me to think of the type of woman Blake would bring home tonight. Will she be another skinny, lanky blonde or will he choose a more exotic girl this time? I shook myself out of these thoughts as I reminded myself that I didn't have a choice in his matters anymore. Stepping out of my car, I walked into my workplace and told myself that it would be different today.

I was surprised when I pulled into the driveway since Blake's car was outside the house. I couldn't fathom why he was home, let alone why he was home this early. He was never home at this time. I know he couldn't stand the thought of being near me for an extended period of time.

I was in a state of shock when I ended at the house, and I was further at a loss for words when I saw Blake just sitting in the living room to my right. He was leaning back against the couch with his suit jacket tossed to the side looking like a model on the cover of men in business issues for a magazine cover.

The thing that shocked me even more than Blake sitting so casually on the couch as there wasn't a woman anywhere near him that I could see at that moment. He was never without a woman, and more rarely was he without a woman in this house. Blake took every chance he had to fling around a girl in front of me. This was why I had no idea what to expect from him at that moment in time.

For a moment, Blake and I just stared at each other in wordless oblivion. I stared into those dark chocolate brown eyes and for a second I thought I saw the Blake I used to know, the one I used to love and adore. My mind chose that moment to attack me with thoughts of Blake changing, that this might be the change I had been waiting to see.

The thoughts in my head clouded the sane part of me causing me to be oblivious to what was to come next...

"I want a divorce."

The four words spoken crashed down on me like tidal waves crashing against a rocky shore. They snapped me out of the love-filled haze I was in making me see reality as it truly is. One sentence had the power to turn my life upside down.

Blake didn't explain why he had spoken those words, the words that I know would haunt me for a lifetime. He didn't even let me say anything in response to his statement. I know it was a statement because he wasn't allowing it to be a question, he didn't allow any room for doubt in either of us that it was a mistake or something that was spoken but not meant. Blake just got up and turned to me with the more menacing glare I have ever seen on his face and I have seen a lot recently.

"Sign the papers and get out," he spat those words at me. Those eyes, the ones I had thought I had seen a glimpse of hope for our future, now held only hate and loathing. I felt the tears well up in my eyes and my lips to shake as I remembered those same eyes staring at me with love, adoration, and happiness not so long ago.

I knew he had seen my thoughts in my eyes. He also knew that I would protest, I would fight against him with everything that I had left. He knew this, so he continued with his mission to shatter me, "Sign the papers or will go to court and I will make sure you will regret not signing them faster. I will not stop until I have gotten rid of you."

Even with his threats, I still was not going to sign those awful papers. I wasn't going to do it. I wasn't going to divorce the man I love. I was sure we could fix this; my hopes were high until he continued...

"Don't you get it," Blake screamed in my face as he approached me. "I hate this life, I hate you. All you do is make me miserable. I thought you were different, that was the only reason I married you. But no..."

Blake trailed his words as he took another step towards me and another as I backed away and my body shrunk down as he appeared to expand in the empty space. He filled the room, breathing down on me as if he was the big bad wolf that would blow me away from him.

He sneered down at me, "You are just like the others: clingy, gold digger, cheater, and liar. I regret marrying you. I don't know any other way to escape this nightmare you call marriage."

I heard every word he said, each word pierced me like a shard of glass cutting into me until it succeeded in cutting my heart. I came to the realization that he truly hated me, he despised me and really couldn't stand to be married to me any longer. I could stand strong against his hate-filled accusations because I knew I was not the person he was accusing me of being. I just couldn't take the part when he said he regretted marrying me.

When he had said that all I could think of was the night of our wedding. He had told me that he had a lot of regrets, but he would never regret marrying me. I had been over the moon with joy when he claimed this, I remember how I had looked at him with so much adoration wondering if this was real.

I finally see that he wasn't real, our marriage wasn't real, nothing was. He was the devil in disguise. Seeing his sheepskin fall apart before my eyes and revealing the wolf he was made me sign the papers without a fight.

It might have seemed to him that I had signed the papers without a fight because what he had accused me of was real, but I knew that real reason I had signed those papers. I was signing them because it meant the end for me. I was finally letting go of my hope that someday we could find our happy ever after.