Despair

twenty-five

❝ trying to rekindle us,
only to lose yourself ❞

*     *     *

it was coming closer to the date of leaving hawaii, and all the happy energy that flowed around the house turned into morose. none of them wanted to leave the dream house, forced to go back to reality when they both preferred this life.

they was watching a movie right now, justin holding the bowl of popcorn on top of selena's thigh, where he was paying intense attention to the movie, grabbing the popcorn when he could. selena wasn't paying attention. she tried to, but she just couldn't. she was scared of going back home. so many people would ask questions, since she told no one where she was going, she just went on the plane mysteriously.

she wanted to stay in this house, undercover, hidden with justin. but she knew they couldn't. nothing good lasts, and selena knew this.

justin had forced selena to give back her phone after scooter rang him one day, telling him he's got to go in the studio. that was the start of the happy energy evaporating.

selena stares sullenly at the tv screen, smiling whenever justin turned to look at her to see her response to whatever happened in the movie. she just smiled when he did, wrapping the blanket tighter around her. she wanted to stay in this moment forever, in this place forever. everything was so much better.

the movie goes on advertisement. justin turns his back to look at selena, but she was slowly falling asleep. he knew what she felt, simply because he felt the same: none of them wanted to leave, they preferred to stay than go back to reality. justin sighs, wishing he could make the last moments in hawaii memorable than just watching a silly movie.

justin stands up, bends down to selena's height, and picks her up in bridal style. selena's eyes open abruptly. "what are you doing?" she squeals, clutching on to justin's top.

"shh," justin soothes.

"no! put me down, justin. this isn't funny," selena scolds, clutching on to his shirt tighter even more.

he didn't take no as an answer. he continues to ascend up the stairs; he takes her to the bedroom they share by mistake, placing her on the bed. he smiles at her expression: she was crossing her arms, pulling a face an eight year old would pull when they would try act upset or angry.

he shrugs carelessly. "go to sleep, you're tired." he starts to walk away from the bed and selena, to the door. selena pulls him back by his hand before he could go out of arm-reach. he turns to her, raising his eyebrows, waiting for an explanation.

"don't go; i'm not tired, just bored." she tugs at justin more, making him sit down beside her on the bed. he smiles at her, unclear on what to say. "how many days have we got left?"

"today and the next two days. three days, basically." he hated saying that. he didn't want three days to stay in hawaii with the girl he favourited, he wanted unlimited amount of time to.

"then you're meant to go back in the studio to make music, and so am i," she says, realising something; "we won't have any time to hang out, would we?" justin shrugs at her question, but he knew the answer: they wouldn't; they'll be busy for the next couple of weeks, trying to produce the new albums.

he groans, rubbing his palms against his face aggressively. selena places her hand over his, pulling his face out of his hands. she smiles sweetly. "we'll figure something out," but none of them knew if this was true.

*     *     *

arriving back at her house after spending two last days with justin in hawaii, she wanted to cry. she did cry in their departure. theresa was sitting in the dining room, awaiting selena since selena texted her saying she was on her way home.

shutting the door, feeling heavy, selena walks in on theresa. "hi," she says glumly to her.

"do you want to explain what's been going on? it hurts me, selena, being in the dark like this."

she heaves a sigh. she had thought about this moment on the journey back to los angeles, she would try and open up more. "i was with justin," she eventually says, "and i was in hawaii."

"justin? what, justin bieber?"

"yes. we had been talking before on the phone, and stuff. he invited me to join him in a getaway to hawaii. i didn't tell you because i thought you would've said no." the truth spills out of selena, and she felt fresh.

*     *     *

a/n;
double updates, like promised.

ok so the hawaii fantasy is finally over, i smell drama in the distance...