she began to drift away.
that was when justin realised something was wrong. how had he not noticed before? obviously, because he was blind. but now that the fog cleared his mind, he noticed. he noticed all the little things she done, like let go of his hand, move away from him.
had it always been like this?
did he imagine the lust, or perhaps love, between them? was it all just him and his pathetic feelings?
this was what was murdering justin.
he noticed every little thing about her, the way her eyes wouldn't sparkle anymore.
did he do something? no, he couldn't have. if he had, she wouldn't be in his arms right now. but when he thought about this, his awful mind brought up a new thought: was he forcing her to stay?
did she not want to be here, in his arms? did she not want his love, his stupid love? was he not worthy of her anymore? what, justin thought, did she suddenly lose interest?
it was thoughts like these that revived his insomnia.
he wanted to act upon his taunting thoughts, but how? speaking his thoughts couldn't happen, because if he couldn't understand them, how could anyone else? how would he be able to explain them, or explain why he was thinking like the way he was?
she stirred in his arms, and he suddenly realised she fell asleep whilst watching a movie he put on. he tries to hold his sigh, not wanting to wake her up. she was so beautiful, and he felt beautiful was an understatement. she was so much more than he could describe or explain.
she deserved everything in the world, more than just his heart.
she deserved better than him, he recognised. she deserved more than the world, she deserved the universe, all the stars included. she was his very sun.
he couldn't stand the silence, even if she was asleep. normally, her presence was enough for him. today, he wanted to hold her more tighter and hear her voice, just to make him feel better.
his heart suddenly felt empty, and she was the cause to it. no, he wasn't blaming her, but you can't have summer when there's no sun.
he could feel her slipping away, even if she was steady in his arms deep in slumber.
"i love you so much, selena," he whispers to himself, feeling a tear roll down his cheek.
* * *
a/n;
an early update because wattpad is boring atm !! also, i highly recommend listening to james arthur's recent album, back from the edge. i'm obsessed !!
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Despair
Fanfiction[completed] she's famous, talented and beautiful - that's what the media and fans sees. truly: she was broken. [ could trigger some people, so read at your own risk. please know that suicide isn't going to help you, it'll cause more pain, but inst...
