Riley and Maya's lives couldn't get any more complicated, or could they? They both have weddings to plan along with going back to school after the birth of Riley and Lucas's daughter, Amelie.
Topanga is finding the house very empty without Riley an...
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Today, Josh has had to go back to school, I haven't yet because the doctor said I was still healing, physically, I'll never be healed mentally. Now Josh isn't here to soothe me, all I can do is cry and blame myself, because this is my fault, I caused the argument with Josh, I stormed off from Josh, I got in the fight with Kelly, I wouldn't let her have Josh therefore this is my fault. I can't take any of this anymore, everything is reminding me of my daughter. I need to get out of here, and that's exactly what I'm gonna do. I get dressed and pack a small bag of essentials, and search through the drawer in our dresser that has all the spare keys in, I find the one I'm looking for, attach it to my car keys and leave. I drive and drive until I get there, I think it's the longest I've gone without crying, the whole ride I was blaring Avril Lavigne and Taylor Swift from my speakers. When I arrive, I put the key inside the hole and open the door, nothing has changed, I shut the door behind me and rush upstairs. I open the door to the room I'll stay in, it hasn't been touched for years. I dumped my bag on the floor a dive into the bed and cry again, this is all my fault. I look over at the clock, Josh will be getting home around now, he probably won't care I've gone, no one will. I want to be with Olympia.
Josh's POV:
"Maya? Babe, I'm home!" I call out as I get home from school, no reply. I go and see if she is in our bedroom, it's empty, I can't find her anywhere. I decide to all her, straight to voicemail. I call Riley.
R: Hey Uncle Josh! J: Hey Riles, have you heard from Maya? R: No, why? J: She's not home and her phone is going straight to voicemail. R: I'll call around our family and go looking for her. J: Thanks Riles. You don't think she's done anything stupid do you? R: I don't think she's in that place anymore. J: She blames herself for Olympia's death though. R: You're right. Josh, we need to find her. Keep me posted. J: That's what I said to cowboy when last time she did something stupid. But I will. Bye Riley. R: Bye Uncle Josh.
I check our key drawer, one's missing, there is usually 8, there's only 7, but I don't know which one is missing. I call Shawn.
J: Shawn, I need your help, I don't know where Maya is, she wasn't here when I got back from school, and her phone is going straight to voicemail. I'm scared she's doing something stupid. S: Okay, I'm coming over now. J: Thanks, bye. S: See you soon.
Moments later, Shawn arrives. "She's taken one of the spare keys but I don't know which one is missing, but I know one is missing as there is meant to be 8, there is 7." I say once I've invited him in. "Where could she go? What are all of the keys for?" Shawn replies. "Riley's place, Topanga's cafe, Cory's place, Mom, Dad and Feeny's place, my parents place in Philly, your place, her old apartment which she had with her mom, my college dorm, and one for our spot." I list. "I know where she is." Shawn says picking up his car keys and we rush down to his truck. I call Riley again.
R: Uncle Josh have you found her? J: No but Shawn thinks he knows where she is. R: Where? J: I don't know, Shawn hasn't said. R: Okay, well tell me when you have her, I'll keep ringing her. J: Okay, Bye Riles. R: Bye.
"Where is she Shawn?" I ask, worried. "Philly." "She's in Philadelphia?" I exclaim and he nods. "I think so." He says. "I hope we get there in time." I say. "We will." Shawn reassures me and drives fast to our hometown.
Maya's POV:
After ages of crying, I decided it's time to start what I came here to do. I line up all my blades, knives and scissors and strip naked. I take a scorching hot shower and then wrap a towel around me and sit on the edge of the bed, with the nearly lined up sharp objects. Slowly, I pick them up individually and cut, my arms, hips, thighs, forearms, everywhere. Blood trickles all over my body and am about to go for my veins with the sharpest object when I hear noise. A knock on the door of the room I'm in, making me jump. "Maya? It's me baby, it's Josh." I hear his soft voice say, from behind the locked door. He's found me. How has he found me? "Joshua? You can't come in, you can't see me right now." I stutter, scurrying to put on my clothes. "Why? Maya, what are you doing to yourself?" "N-nothing Josh." "I'm gonna bust this door in now." He announces. Crash. He breaks it open and a look of pain and sympathy fill his face. "Oh baby, you've never cut this much My." He says, wrapping me in his arms, rocking me as I cry. "I can't do this anymore. It's too hard, it's my fault our daughter is dead! I deserve to be hurt! I don't know why you haven't left me yet Josh, it's my fault we lost her and you know it! I'm no good for you! You deserve someone better than me! Everyone does! Please just let me go." I cry, I feel like I'm having a breakdown. "Maya. Look at me and listen." Josh demands in a stern voice, and lifts my head up to face his. "This was Kelly's fault, not yours, I promise. Please trust me that it wasn't your fault Olympia has gone. So you don't deserve any hurt, because you've gone through enough in your life and that's not fair because you don't deserve any of it because you have the greatest capacity for love I have ever seen, which is one the millions of reasons I love you and will never leave you, so please don't try and leave me and the rest of the world. I've barely been able to cope since we lost our daughter, I think I would die if I lost you too. Maya please believe me. I love you and I'm never letting you go." He tells me, not breaking any eye contact. I'm now crying hysterically. "I'm so sorry Josh. I love you too." I sob. "Come here." He brings me into his arms. "It doesn't take away the pain though." I sob. "I know. I don't think anything will." "It won't, Josh I've tried everything and none of it even comes close." "Which is why we have to stay together. Things are going to take time baby." He says. "Can we stay here for a while?" "Yeah. But what about school?" He kisses my forehead. "We don't have long left, if we go back and try to get through it and then stay here for the summer? Just the two of us?" I suggest. "That's a perfect idea. Now let's close those cuts baby, they look bad." He kisses my forehead again. "I'm sorry there's so many." "It's okay just please promise to stop?" He asks. "Okay."! I reply and he cleans and dresses all the cuts. "Oh by the way, your dad is downstairs." Josh tells me as he helps me get dressed. I finish getting ready and hurry down to him and jump into his arms. "Dad. I'm sorry." "It's okay kiddo, I was just worried. Did you do anything to yourself?" He asks and I nod guiltily. "Babygirl." He sighs. "It's okay, you're okay now." He assures me as he hugs me more. "I think you should call Riley, she's been worried about you." Dad tells me, passing me his phone.
M: Hey Riley R: Peaches! Are you okay? M: Yeah, I'm okay, you don't have to worry anymore. R: Where are you? M: Your grandparents house in Philadelphia. R: Philadelphia? That's along way to go! M: I guess. I'm coming home soon though, I'll see you then, okay? R: Okay, love you Peaches! M: Love you too Riles. Bye. R: Bye!
I pass dad back his phone and Josh wraps me in his arms. "Maya, I've been thinking, maybe we should see a grief councillor?" Josh suggests. "I think that might actually be a good idea. But can we do it together? And I'm stopping if I feel it's useless." I reply. "Of course we'd do it together. We're in this together, remember?" He says and I nod shyly. "God, I love you so much Maya." Josh says hugging me tightly again, sitting me down on the couch. "Me too kiddo, please don't scare us like that again. I thought we were gonna be to late." Dad tells me, coming to the other side of couch. "I'm sorry." "It's okay My." Josh says. "Now, as we've all had a long day, wanna order some pizza?" Dad suggests, and for the first time since that day, that actually sounds good, I nod yes and Josh looks surprised, but relieved. "Maya, I'm glad you're gonna eat something, it's been nearly a month and I haven't seen you eat a thing." Josh tells me. "I'm hungry today for the first time." I reply and dad goes to the kitchen to order the pizza.
It's the first day that has felt like I'm making progress to move on, and continue with my life...
