Just A Bromance (Troyler Fanfic) [ Tyler Oakley + Troye Sivan ]

Chapter 33 - Troye's POV

Troye's POV.

After having dinner with Zalfie, Tyler and I head back to the hotel, Tyler still annoyed with me for teasing him. Well, I don't care. He deserved it. By the time we make it back to our room, Tyler's dropped the act and is his normal self again. I smile to myself as he heads into the bathroom. I turn the tv on, looking through the movie channels and collapsing down onto the couch. When Tyler comes out of the bathroom ten minutes later, I still haven't chosen anything. I look up as he walks in the room, my eyes immediately being drawn to his shirtless chest. I catch myself staring and quickly look up at his face, thankful that he had his head down drying his hair and didn't see me staring. He offers to pick a movie and I get up, heading into the bathroom for my own shower.

I wash up quickly, only taking a short shower. Once I hop out, I dry myself off, pulling on a pair of sweats. I look in the mirror, frowning as I trace my fingers over the scars on my sides. I feel the skin there itching and I'm suddenly overcome with the need to make it bleed again. I grip onto the sink before shaking my head wildly. I suddenly push myself away from the mirror, practically running out into the lounge and jumping on Tyler. He grunts as the full weight of me lands on him, but he wraps his arms around me anyways.

"Troye, you okay?" I shake my head silently against his neck, hot tears falling from my eyes and onto his skin. He rocks back and forth, humming quietly into my ear, and I'm overcome with affection for him. I'm particularly grateful that he asks no questions and just holds me, because I wouldn't know what to say if he asked what was wrong. Nothing's wrong, really. Everything's perfect, it really is. I don't know why I'm feeling like this. It just comes out of nowhere. One second, I'll be happy and okay, and then something happens that kind of triggers the pain inside of me. And if there's one thing we all know about pain, it's that it demands to be felt. Suddenly a wave of emotions creeps up on me, and I tense up in Tyler's arms, pulling back to look at him. He looks at me, questioning and I look down. Here comes the word vomit.

"Why are you still here?" He looks confused by the question. "Why do you deal with me? I'm messed up and gross and I cry all the time and you could have any guy in the world, but you're sitting here with an ugly depressed freak." He immediately opens his mouth to speak but I hold up my hand, not finished yet. "I wouldn't blame you if you left. I know I'm a lot to handle and you don't have to go through this with me. It's okay to leave. I won't blame you. I mean, who wants somebody as messed up as me?" Tyler places his hand over my mouth, looking a bit angry as he looks at me.

"Do you really think I would ever leave you?" I shrug my shoulders slightly and Tyler sighs, the anger in his eyes slowly turning into sadness.

"Troye, I love you. More than anyone I've ever loved before. You are not messed up or ugly or a depressed freak. If either of us could have any guy in the world, it certainly wouldn't be me. Yes, sometimes you are a lot to handle, but so is anybody else in the world, and so am I sometimes. I would rather spend all my time here with you than I would with some perfect guy that isn't you. I love you because you're Troye. You're the most amazing guy on earth and it hurts me to think that you don't believe me when I say that. Maybe you wouldn't blame me if I left, but I would blame myself. Not only would I be hurting you if I did that, I would be hurting myself. I feel empty when I'm away from you, and hurting you is the worst feeling in the world."

He stops speaking and just buries his face in my hair. I try to suppress my tears, failing miserably. I take in a shaky breath before speaking again.

"I-I love you too." He hugs me closer to him and I tuck my body as close to him as possible. He picks a film and we cuddle as it starts playing. Before the film really starts though, my eyelids start to feel heavy and I yawn. Tyler gently leads my head to rest on his chest and I smile slightly to myself, allowing my eyes to close for the night.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N

I'm sorry for all the short, rushed chapters. I'm going through some shit right now and I'm just trying to make sure I have at least one update for you guys every day.

Please give me some feedback?? Remember to Vote AND Comment.

What kind of chapters do you want more of?

1. Smutty?

2. Cute/Fluffy?

3. Drama/Action?

4. Other ideas?

Message me on tumblr if you'd like.

Tumblr: tilly-oakley

IG: tillyoakley

Twitter: tillyoakley_

Dedication: LenaBe6 for always commenting! Thanks, sweetie (: