thoughts on clouds

Untitled Part 14

It's like I'm on a never ending ladder 

And I'm climbing and climbing 

trying to reach the sky holding my hopes and dreams 

Each cloud a whisper of my would be success 

Sometimes I can feel myself moving foward 

Sometimes I can almost touch the clouds above and with every inch closer I feel it in me 

I feel it so deep in my soul that I want to scream 

I feel it drumming in my veins with every heartbeat 

This feeling of urgency to get out 

To be someome 

And in the pit of my stomach lies a flame so raw,  a longing so strong 

that I want to turn my insides out 

In hope that someday I'll feel real 

Then there are some days

Where no matter how far I go

I seem to be falling , falling, falling 

Plumeting* to the ground 

and it crushes my insides 

Every bone every desperate aching muscle 

And the pain is so raw I can feel it in my heart 

I can feel the waves of dissapoint wash over me until I'm drowning 

And I'm thrashing , turning, fighting against the current so adamant on holding me back 

But I am alone and my pain is invisible and it seems my fate lies below the sea bed 

At the bottom of this pit I can't seem to escape