thoughts on clouds

neglected

they tell us it's normal to cry
every night
Monday to Friday
A 9-5 of big blotchy tears reminding us we're not strong enough
apparently bloodstained wrists and fists clenched in frustration are all apart of growing up
they'll tell you it's normal to hate yourself
to want to decompose and wither into nothing
It's just puberty taking its course
apparently feelings don't matter between the ages 11-16
pain doesn't matter because everything is changing and that overshadows what you feel inside
Bleach is now more than just a household object
Razor blades have so much more meaning than the occasional shave
we're marked with labels from A-F or 1-9
Why is it when we cry we're told to relax,  it's not a big deal calm down
but later we're told they determine the rest of our lives
100% is not enough
Giving your entire mind body and soul is not enough
students joke about slitting their wrists and tying the noose
but when the laughter dies down we see the reality
We see unhappy kids scared for a future that might never come
we see kids hiding behind jokes and bad behaviour
To hide the fear they really feel
That maybe just maybe they are not enough
And maybe just maybe they can't handle it
And you put this idea into our heads that exams and tests are everything
And you keep piling bags onto our shoulders expecting us to be the first across the finish line
and when we stumble from the weight and cry out in pain from our calloused feet littered with blisters
you're surprised when we skip school because our minds are tearing us apart from the inside out
you drill in this idea about 100% attendance and 100% effort and in the end we're 100% more anxious and 100% more done with this life and the next
you put up all these posters about getting help and all these bullshit assemblies about how help is available
But when kids are crying it screaming at you all you hear is silence
and that's the silence we feel
deep in our souls it's silence that leaves a gaping hole
and you ignore it
and you ignore us
because you don't really care that we're suffering
as long as we suffer with perfect uniform and a passing grade it's good enough