Survivor { R5 fanfiction}

Chapter 52

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Sometimes I feel completely insane when I read what I actually wrote 😅
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RYLAND

Ross has changed. Not, in a bad way or anything, I just feel like... He isn't himself anymore. He isn't as happy as he used to be. Well, I understand, in such a situation, I probably would've reacted the same way. But I miss this side of him. It's like he's pretending to be someone else. He never smiles, he barely talks. Always has this blank expression on his face. Always do what he's told to do. He tries keep to himself the most he can.

So of course, when Ellington judged we could split the group, I gladly accepted to pair with my brother. He didn't seem to mind that, and it sort of reassure me. He isn't mad with me or anything.

He did mind leaving the little one who joined us not long ago though. He's being paying more attention to him than myself, being protective and acting like a big brother to him. He gets all his rare smiles.

I still can't believe I feel jealousy toward a 7 years old.

Ross and I have to watch everyone's back, while most of the group is between us and Hailey, Riker and Rydel, scouting. I do my best to follow his steps, which are fast and determined.

"Can-can you slow down? We're not running marathon." I pant. He halts to slowly turn toward me, the same blank look which seems to never leave him.

"We already don't see the others in front of us anymore. We shouldn't lose sight of them."

"Ellington said it doesn't matter."

"Ell can't be right all the time." With that, he walks again, but slower, as I wished. Glad he actually considered my feelings. I longly sigh as I eventually join his side.

"What?"

"What, what?"

"You sigh a lot."

"You ask questions a lot." I reply. Ross snorts.

"I just wanted to know what was wrong, but if I'm being annoying..."

"Nothing. Everything's all right." He doesn't hide the smirk growing on his face.

"Liar."

"I'm not!" I protest.

"Yeah sure."

"You're just walking too fast and it tires me." My brother shakes his head in disbelief.

"You can talk to me ya know? I won't bite."

"Was it a joke?"

"Yeah..." Ross chuckles, which cause me to follow." Bitting like an Infected. I thought it sounded cool."

"It did! You're getting used to your new condition?" Ross shrugs.

"It's not like I have a choice."

Silence falls upon us afterward. I would like to talk about everything, but I don't dare to open my mouth. He seems too focused now.

"I have a urge to pee." I shyly speak up after a while, perfectly knowing I'll disturb us in our momentum. A look of disbelief crosses Ross' face as he turns toward me.

"Seriously?!"

"What don't you understand in urge to pee?"

"All right, all right." He sighs." Just... Go nearby and be quick. I'll watch."

"Thank you."

Ross nods at me, and look away, a cautious hand on his knife.

I walk toward a little street between two stores, glancing behind my back from time to time, to observe he doesn't even check on me once. I turn around, head hung low.
I verify the street is really empty, before fully stepping in. Only trashes on the floor, I'll be fine.