Shawn Mendes Imagines

114- Screaming

I sat on the black leather couch of my apartment and stuck my spoon violently into the pot of ice cream which was placed on my lap. The anger was still bubbling up inside of me just like a volcano waiting to erupt. I hadn't cried and I won't cry, I'm not wasting my tears over something that's done, over; something that never actually mattered.

He was a jerk. A lying, cheating jerk.

The doorbell echoed through my apartment and I slowly placed the tub on the table in front of me. I pull open the door immediately regretting it when I see Shawn's friend, Brian, twiddling his thumbs.

"Can I help you?" I asked coldly and he nodded.

"Shawn just wanted me to tell you that's he's in the car and he wants to speak to you."

"No, I don't want to speak to him." I huffed and closed the door but he stuck his foot in it causing it to bounce back a little. "What? Don't you get it! I don't want to see him."

"You know that if you don't go to him he'll just come to you." I shrugged.

"Let him do what he wants. That's what got himself into this trouble in the first place." He nodded.

"Fine" he groaned. "I tried buddy" he shouted back at Shawn. I heard a car horn honk and Brian left muttering a quick goodbye. I slammed the door shut. I manoeuvred back to the living room and picked up my tub and started to eat away at it again.

The wind outside was frigid and I could hear the small drips of rain trailing down the window and onto the window cill. I tried hard to focus but the branches attaching my window made it hard to concentrate. I frowned.

"y/n" I widened my eyes and realised that those were not branches that was Shawn creeping his way into my house. I stay put and put up my biggest barrier which stopped me from falling for those puppy dog eyes or for his dreamy smile or for any of his features for that matter.

His footsteps echoed through the dimly lit hallways and stopped once he reached the living room. I felt his presence behind me and I ignored him.

"hi" he muttered lowly. I ignored him. "y/n, come on love. Speak to me. How do we expect this to work out if you won't speak to me."

"There's nothing to work out. You lied and cheated. That's enough to end a relationship for good, you know, you should be glad that I haven't called the cops already." I stood up and headed over towards him. "You cheated on me and denied it. You lied to me!"

"I didn't lie"

"Well why was she coming out of your house at 7:00 in the morning, eh? Did you have a sleepover or something?"

"I didn't lie to you. I told you the truth. We were working on something."

"Working on each other more like" I scoffed.

"Oh, for crying out loud y/n. I didn't cheat on you. I didn't do anything unfaithful and I wouldn't dream of doing something like that to you because I love you!" He raised his voice a little but slowly raised his hand to my cheek and started to caress it.

"You liar!" I screamed and pushed him towards the door.

"I didn't lie" he said as he moved closer to me keeping his calm.

"You liar!" I started to repeatedly slap his chest as the hot tears fell down my face. I was screaming and shouting but it didn't make me feel any better.

For the first time I felt the true feeling of utter heartbreak and I couldn't control it. It was overwhelming and I was sinking. It was like I was being pushed underwater by the person I love yet I was still trying to swim to him just so I could see his face one last time before I drown under all these emotions.

"I didn't lie!" He sighed.

"Well what was she doing there?!" I shouted.

"I told you, we were working on something, something special. For you..."

"I just don't believe you" I mumbled. I placed my head in my hands. The tears were exploding out of my eyes and my now and cheeks began to redden. My breathing became unsteady and his arms enveloped me into a hug pulling me closer to him.

"I didn't lie!" He said again. "I didn't. It's you, it's only ever been you and it will only ever be you. I'm hopelessly in love with you and if you think I would throw this all away then you really don't know me as well as I thought you did."

"I promise. Seeing you crying hurts me and it's even worse that fact I did this to you. It's like a jab to the stomach- actually, it's worse than that and I can't seem to describe it but I love you"

"Why was she there? Why was she with you?"

He guided me over to the couch and he sat next to me. He wiped my tears and took my hands in his.

"I'm telling you the truth, you have to believe me. She was helping me work on something. Something so special that I am waiting for the right time to do it" he smiled a little bit. "And I feel bad for not telling you right now but hopefully you'll be happy when you find out and that's all I want."

"Why is now not the right time to tell me?" I asked. I gently moved on to his lap and rested my head in his chest listening to his heartbeat. He caressed my hair and played with my fingers with his spare hand.

"Because we have just been kicking and screaming at each other. I don't want it to happened because it's pressured I want to wait till it's just right." I nodded. "I'm sorry" I pressed a kiss to his cheek and he smiled.

"No, I'm sorry for being a bitch" I sighed. "It's just, I love you so much that it hurts me to see you with any other girl and I can't bare the thought of you leaving me."

"I would never leave you." I smiled and attached myself to him, wrapping my arms tightly around his waist.

"I love you, I love you, I love you"