Love Will Make You Stay

Hurt

STEF POV

"Well honey I told you and you know I don't like to say I told you so."

"Yes mom, I know I just didn't set out to hurt him and I never expected..." I said trailing off as I stood in my mother's kitchen with a headache taking over. Truth was I was never one to just randomly show up at her apartment but after my blowout with Mike I didn't know who else to talk too. 

"What, you didn't expect to fall in love with Lena?"

Looking to her my eyes widened.

"Mom, how many times do I need to tell you. I'm not in love with Lena. We are friends and..

"And you are. You are in love with her. I know that and she's in love with you."

"Mom we are just friends. Nothing more."  I said shaking my head taking another sip of coffee and trying my hardest to deny my feelings which was proving to be unsuccessful. Feelings like this just weren't allowed.

"Ok if you're just friends then why are you so angry at your ex husband? And why is he so angry at you? Because you won't sleep with him?

"Mom he said some really nasty things about Lena. That she's milking this and claiming I'm at her beck and call and that she doesn't do anything. He had no right."

"That is very true. I mean I highly doubt Lena is milking this. She seems like a very very pleasant and sweet woman who happens to love you. Does she know you were married to Mike?"

"Yes mother she knows." Taking a seat at her table I took another sip of coffee. "And she's not in love with me."

"Ok let's say shes not. Lets say neither of you are in love with each other. I guess if that's the case when she moves out it will be no issue. Unless you plan on rooming together until those girls turn 18."

"What so you are going to accuse me of playing house too?"

"Baby don't get defensive. I said no such thing. Listen to me even if you aren't in love there are some intense feelings flying around. I see how she looks at you honey and it's not how you look at a friend. At first I thought maybe she just liked you, had a crush on you, but I don't think that's what it is. I told you that before."

"And you are an expert mother?"

"No I don't claim to be. Not at all. But this is clear as the light of day honey."

"Well mother your vision must be off."

"Fine if my vision is off why did you stop sleeping with Mike?"

"Mother really. I honestly don't want to talk about my sex life with you. Seriously."

"Oh Stefanie relax. Pretend for a minute I'm not your mother that I'm a friend. You stopped sleeping with him because what the sex is bad?"

"Oh my god I can't believe you are asking me this."

"Oh stop being so uptight and answer the question. Come on play along. Did you stop screwing him because the sex is bad?"

"No mother. Ok. The sex was fine."

"Ok then why?"

"I don't know I'm just, I don't want to anymore. Is that a crime?"

"No it's not but I'm asking you questions you need to ask yourself baby. You won't sleep with him anymore because your heart is somewhere else. And that's ok I told you that before. But you need to ask yourself what it is you want, what you feel. And you need to ask Lena how she feels and if the two of you plan on raising these children together until they are 18 as friends or as lovers? Stefanie you can deny it all you want but eventually your heart is going to catch up no matter how much you try to resist it.  And that's a fact babygirl. Don't resist it."