My Brother's Bestfriend-Louis Tomlinson Fanfic

Chapter 67

I dove back into my covers as soon as I got home from the doctors office. They took x-rays of basically everything and told me everything was healing alright and I could go back to school on Wednesday, as long as if I didn't do any strenuous activity. I didn't want to go back to school. Today was Monday so that only gave me a day to figure out what to do with my face or for it to magically heal, which I seriously doubt. I don't think makeup can cover all this, I look like something out of a horror movie.

Todd already talked to the principal and he agreed to exempt all assignments that weren't necessary for my final grade. He also agreed to keep a level of confidentiality but that might make things worse. Now everyone was going to be asking me questions.

I don't even know what happened to Tyler. I asked Amanda a couple times but she never answered. I guess I would find out eventually. I don't honestly think he could do much worse except for kill me. Which would put me in a way better place then I am now.

I'm really an idiot and I hate myself. Why did I say I didn't love him when I actually do? He just put me in a really hard spot. I wanted him to leave because I just was too upset and I didn't want to say anything I regretted, which I did anyways. But when he told me that he wouldn't leave unless I said I didn't love him he made me choose. I didn't want to say I did love him because I didn't want him to get false hope but I didn't want to lie to him and hurt him either. Maybe this is better, maybe now he will be able to move on from me. I think us being together just wont work even though I want it to. I'm just dealing with problems of my own and I don't want to drag him along with me.

I wonder what he's doing right now.... Is he breaking things or punching holes in his wall? What if he's not at home..... What if he's out drinking...? It has been a day but I had a feeling that the repercussions would last longer than a day. What if I completely ruined him.... What if he's just done with love now? What if he blames himself?

I quickly grabbed my phone, placing the battery back in. I was hoping he texted me something yesterday about how he actually didn't believe me. I hope he didn't believe me, I wish he saw through my lie. I scrolled through the hundreds of texts, not daring to read them, but just reading the dates. There was nothing from Louis from the past few days. I realized that I finally got what I wanted... him to move on.

.......

There was a light knocking at my door and then in walked Amanda.

"Hey," she smiled. She closed the door as she walked in, sitting on my desk chair. "How are you feeling?" she asked. I sat up in my bed leaning against the mass of pillows I built up around me.

"Do you mean mentally or physically?" I replied.

"Physically," she clarified.

"Alright. I mean it looks like I just did a round with a grizzly bear but it doesn't hurt that bad anymore."

"Good and what about the mentally...." I groaned, closing my eyes shut tight. Mentally I was exhausted and hurting.

"It's terrible. I wish I was brain dead. Then at least I wouldn't have a thought process."

"No you don't. You're too smart. It would be a waste."

"No I'm an idiot trust me. I would be doing the world a favor."

"Why?" Should I tell her....? I tell her everything, literally everything. I took a deep breath in and tried to think of what to say.

"I told him I didn't love him," I said at a rapid speed. She stared at me in awe for a few seconds.

"What?" she said in disbelief. I wasn't going to repeat myself and I'm pretty sure she heard me the first time. "W-why... why would you do that?" she stuttered.