Be A Girl

Self-Harm

Reason #3 I'm writing this: You can't save people, you can only love them.

Self Harm and suicide:

"I remember thinking the world would be better off without me," -Demi Loavto

"Some people live all their lives to hear the words “I love you”. For me I always wanted to hear the words “I understand”.

Mariam. I thought about how I should start this, over and over again. I wanted to just..avoid this. But I can't. I just can't! I need to know why!

Why? Why did you do it? From all the people you where the one that always told us to stay strong! I miss you! I want to talk to you and hug you and punch you and slap you for leaving me alone..I miss you! And I'd do anything to know why you left!

You know how I knew? I woke up, went through my day normaly, then I heard this joke and I was like "Mariam is so gonna like this!" So I sent you a text with the joke..but you didn't reply. So I asked if your okay..and you didnt answer. By that point, I was sure you were mad at me. So you know what I did? I asked Farah to talk to you and know what's up..and that's how I knew.

I knew that one of my dearest friend isn't answering, 'cause she cant anymore.

And damn, I know I'm selfish but I need you!

Ever since that day (23/3/2014, I shall never forget) I've been spending hours on the internet, reading people's experiences on self-harm, and why they do it. I wont lie and say I've ever tried it..but I understand

You needed someone and I'm so sorry I wasn't there. I also know why you never told us. You thought we'd judge you..call you a freak. But you know what? I think people who make fun of people who cut are the most disgusting thing you will ever see.

You opened my eyes. I wish you didnt have to use a fork to open them, cause it hurt so much, but my eyes are open. People everyday do the same thing. People, you didnt feel like it was worth it anymore. Like it's better if you just disappear. And it's not and I should have been there to make you see that!

I see, and I promise I wont let anyone feel like you did ever again, Mariam. And between you and me, you better start running cause when I come up there I am SO kicking your ass for leaving me in that shit-hole alone! You were wrong, you were loved..and you still are.

Dear whoever ever cuts, pinches, hits or any other kind of self-harm, don't you dare do it again! This is not an order, not a command, this is a plea! You're not alone! Someone somewhere will cry their eyeballs till it hurts so much they cant close their eyes for you! I would know, I've been there. I know what you're thinking, "So you can hurt me but I can't hurt myself?" But damn, we -the ones begging you to stop- never want to hurt you.

I never want to see you hurt. pain doesn’t need to be permanent. Just stop. Please.. I know you think it doesnt get better, but it HAS to..it will...everything gets better. I'm here, know that. I'm here for you. Just text me..whatever it is, I'll be there. You're not alone..yes, you. 

Stop cutting yourself, precious. I dont want others to cry like I did for you..

To all those who do NOT cut or self-harm, look around, find someone who needs to remember how good they are and help them. You can save a light from perishing..you can make someone believe. Please, we need you.

In memory of Mariam and Sienna...Dear Sienna, I don't know you, but whoever you were, you were loved. Art told me about you when I told her about Mariam, I know this might sound weird but if you ever meet her up there.. tell her you want to be her friend. She's shy at first, but you'll love her.

#CutCakeNotWrist. I'm here 24/7 to help you. Just text me..your too beautiful to break!

"I want to say something to all the girls who think the right response to a boy breaking up with them is to go up to their rooms and cut themselves, when a better way is to throw a pizza party for their girlfriends. They can celebrate no longer trying to please someone who doesn't give a crap." -Trevor Veale

Stay strong little fighter, it gets brighter.