Anger Issues

five

Austin

"What?" I asked.

My nerves calmed down. I steadied my breathing and put all my attention on her.

"Nothing. Forget it," she said, as she began driving.

I sat back and stared out the window.
She loves me...

She passed my house, and instead went to hers. "Why-"

"Because Caleb texted me asking about you, and when I tell him you're here he'll come to pick you up."

As we got out of the car, she grabbed my hand and led me into the house. Noah was standing in the living room, waiting for her arrival.

"Ten minutes, Noah. Just ten minutes and you can do whatever you want," she said, before he even spoke.

She brought me upstairs and sat me on the edge of her bed, as she left to the bathroom.

In two minutes, she returned with a wet wash cloth. I hadn't even seen myself, but if she was doing this, it had to have been bad.

"I'm sorry," I said, as she tilted my face up.

I felt her softly rub the cloth against the side of my eye and on my cheeks.

She stayed silent.

She brought the cloth down to my jawline, causing me to flinch in pain.

"I'm sorry," she said. "Don't. I am," I said.

Again, she stayed silent. "Jess please," I said, setting my hands on her thighs. She stood in front of me but I was sitting down. The action happened naturally.

She left the room and again returned, this time with Q-tips, ointment and a few bandaids.

"This is going to burn," she warned.

I felt a slight burn next to my eye, as she rubbed the cream on it, then placed a small bandaid above it.

She did it again to wherever else  was needed, before throwing out the scraps and leaving the rest on her dresser.

"Jess, please talk to me," I pleaded. "Is that the only reason you went? For the money?" She asked.

I nodded my head. "Are you sure it isn't because Damian was an ass to me and my friends?"

She got me there. I lied to her already. I didn't want to do it again.

"Both," I said. "Thank you," she said after a few seconds. "But don't do it again. Please."

I nodded my head.

"You should call Caleb," she said. I took my phone out of my pocket and called him.

"Where are you?" He asked. "Jess picked me up. I'm at her house," I explained. "Can I trust you to actually get home or do I need to pick you up?"

I sighed. "I'll come."

With that, the call ended and I stood up. "I'm walking home," I said.

With her arms crossed, she nodded her head. "I'll walk you out."

She followed behind me until we got to the porch outside of her house.

"I'm sorry," I said. "Will you please call m-"

"I'm supposed to be grounded," she cut me off. I nodded my head, and pressed a kiss to her head.

I walked down her porch and made my way home. The entire time, all I could think about was what she had said to me.

I wanted to say it to her first. But she caught me by surprise. I'm not sure why I didn't say it back. I know I felt it. But for some reason, I couldn't say it.

In a couple minutes, I unlocked the doors to my house and walked in, going to the kitchen. "What happened?" Caleb asked.

I sighed. "There was a fight.. the prize was money," I said, running my hands through my hair.

"Dumbass," he shook his head. I stayed quiet. "It's okay," he said.

I looked at him curiously. "We all do dumb shit," he shrugged. "I can be mad at you, but I won't."

"Caleb," I began, sitting across him on the kitchen island.

"Hmm?"

"Jess told me she loves me," I said. He motioned with his hands for me to continue.

"But I couldn't say it back," I added. "And I don't know why."

He took a few moments to think. "Do you feel the same way?" He asked. I nodded my head. "I know I do."

"What stopped you?" He asked. "I don't know. It's weird. I don't think I've ever heard..." I trailed off, my eyes focusing on the island table as I realized something.

"I'm tired," I changed the subject. "Bro, wait," he called. "No I'll talk with you tomorrow. I'm going to get some rest," I stood up.

I grabbed my things and took myself upstairs.

Collapsing on my bed, a million thoughts rushed through my head.

Why have I just noticed this?