Anger Issues

forty four

Austin

My heart nearly stopped. Jess immediately started crying.

"What? Why, what happened?" I asked. "There's no way to tell right now. It could've been anything," he gently explained.

Noah dropped to the seat again, in shock. I dropped my grip on Jess' hand, leaning my back against the wall.

"I'm sorry for your loss," he said, beginning to stand up. "We'll give you some time," he said, leaving the room with the other two.

I felt tears sting my eyes.

Our baby..

It's gone.

I grabbed Jess by the hand, only for her to stand up, and wrap her arms around me.

She was sobbing, hard. The same way she did when she first found out she was pregnant.

Noah was still in shock. He was zoned out, clearly in thought. Nothing but confusion plastered on his face.

I didn't even have any words to say. I just held Jess tightly, letting a few tears fall.

We didn't think the baby at first was the best. But in that sonogram, when we saw our child.. we knew damn well we were wrong.

We fell in love immediately, only to be let down.

Noah finally came out of his trance, standing up. Of the three of us, he was staying strong.

He walked closer to us. I nodded my head, softly pulling Jess away from me so Noah could have a turn to hug her.

She didn't stop crying, she didn't react to the change. She just wrapped her arms weakly around him, and sobbed against his chest.

I ran my fingers through my hair, turning around as more tears fell. I hated crying. I usually did whatever I could to not cry, but this time, there was no chance of me being able to.

I bit the sleeve of my sweater, before crossing my arms. Sniffing, I wiped my stinging eyes.

I turned back around to see Noah softly whispering to Jess. I could've focused my hearing to hear what he was saying, but I couldn't. I couldn't take my mind off of the doctors words. They constantly kept replaying in my head.

The three of us, all complete messes, stood in the room for minutes. I composed myself as best as I could, but Jess was still lost. Noah and I tried whatever we could to calm her down, but nothing worked.

The doctor came back in after a few minutes, forcing her to calm down a bit. He was understanding about it, trying to be as genuine and caring as he could.

He explained to us what needed to be done. The procedure to.. remove the baby. How to make the appointment, what would happen, and what she needed to do.

It only made her cry harder. She couldn't even speak. She just nodded her head. We could see her biting the inside of her mouth, trying to control the sobs and yet, still nothing worked.

We got the few pictures of the baby, and paperwork along with it, before being escorted out. Jess hadn't stopped crying. My eyes remained teary, and Noah was completely emotionless.

He was hurt. He wasn't showing it, but he was. He wasn't showing anything, and that's how I knew.

As we got in the car, Jess kept her head on my shoulder. I rested my head on top of hers, letting her cry. Noah was driving us home, and on the way, she passed out.

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