Secret // Calum Hood

16

Elena

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said, my voice shaking.  I got up and crossed my arms, not caring that the warm blood was getting smeared on them.  I hid them well enough so that Calum couldn’t see.

“Elena-” he warned.

He stepped closer, but before he could come near me, I took off.  I slipped off my heels so I could run properly, and I ran outside the school.  I ran past the soccer field, the gas station, the library, all of the places that I saw every day on the way home.  My feet hurt like hell from the rough ground, but it wasn’t comparable to the pain I was in right now.  He could not have seen, it’s impossible.  I won’t let it happen.  This is MY secret, MY escape.  It’s the only sense of control I have, I won’t let him take it away!

I knew he would try and follow me.  As soon as I reached my house, he was there.  I nervously looked in the driveway, but Mom’s car was gone.  We were alone.  I tried to get in the house before he could.  As soon as I was on the porch, he was running up the sidewalk.  I fumbled with my key and finally got it in the door, turning the lock.  I was about to close the door for good when Calum stopped it with his foot.

“Elena,” he said sternly. “Let me in”.

“No!”

“Fine!” he said, and he shoved the door wide open and stepped inside.  I stumbled backwards, losing control over my balance and my life.

“I saw!” he yelled.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” I said in return.  Just deny everything.  He’ll go away if I deny it, he has to.

“Yes you do!  I saw the blood on your arm, Elena!” he pointed at my arm, making me cover it subconsciously.

“I told you I had an injury on my arm and the bandage came off, that’s all!” I cried.  It was all happening again, I could feel it.  Everything was getting out of control, building up inside.  I was going to explode.

“That’s bullshit and you know it!  I saw what you did Elena!” he yelled, his eyes furious.  I had never seen this side of Calum before, and it was scaring me.  He kept stepping closer, and I kept backing away.  But this room is only so large.

“You didn’t see anything!” I screamed.

“I saw you deliberately cut yourself,” he yelled, emphasising every word he spoke.

“You didn’t see anything!” I yelled again.

“Just let me help you!” he shouted.

“I don’t need help!  THERE”S NOTHING WRONG WITH ME!” I screamed.

He was as close as ever now, just a foot away.  There was no place else I could run to.  He literally had me in a corner.  

“Then show me your arm,” he said calmly.

“There’s nothing wrong with me,” I said in return.  Maybe if I say it enough, he’ll go away.  If I say it enough, maybe even I will believe it.

“THEN SHOW ME YOUR ARM!” he yelled again, louder than before.

There was nothing, absolutely nothing I could do.  I sighed deeply, feeling exhausted.  My body swayed, losing balance.  Crying, and shaking, I slowly held out my arm to Calum.  I couldn’t hold back now.  I was full on sobbing, my body was weak and trembling.  Calum came closer until he was holding me, holding my bloody, outstretched wrist.  He took it in his hand and squeezed it gently.  I couldn’t do anything right now but be the blubbering mess that I was.  Calum suddenly wrapped his arms around me, and I could feel the warmth of his body around mine.  

“I’m here, don’t cry.  I can help you,” he whispered in my ear.

This only made me push him away and cry more.  Confused, he looked at me, waiting for an explanation.  Finding my words, I began.

“You think it’s that easy?  That you can just come into my life, and fix me?  It doesn’t work like that!  You can’t ever fix me!  You can’t help me!  You think you can just show up, try and be my friend, try and show that you care?  Or try and be the hero that saves the girl? The cute guy that’s the magical answer to all of my problems? Well guess what?  It’s not like that!  Nothing will ever help me!  It doesn’t matter what you do, because it will always be there! The hurt, and the pain, and the reasons why will always be there!  You can’t fix me!” I cried, sliding down the wall onto the floor, breaking down completely.

Calum sat next to me and wrapped his arms around me once again, and I was too tired to push him away.  He held me close, had me completely enveloped in him.  His lips tickled my ear, and his breath was cool as he spoke.

“I can try”.

-

CALUM YOU GIVE ME FEELS

three updates in one day whaaaattttttt

sorry this is so short. 

I don't even know.

I am so emotional right now.

Like this scene reminds me of on Degrassi when Paige saw Ellie.

I'm rambling, sorry.

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