See I'm glad I've been stuck at home with my family and not turning into one of these horrible teenagers who don't think or care. I can't understand how they think getting wasted is so much fun? It's not, people get hurt and I was one of those people. See now I get why I'd stayed away from all of this drama, this relationship stuff. It just wasn't worth it. After a long shower, which I cried in most of the time. I wrapped myself up in my blanket and fell asleep. I couldn't stop thinking about the whole night and the only thing to ruin it was my own boyfriend who was clueless about how I was feeling but as long as his feeling were known it was okay!? Fuck, I'm so angry with myself right now. I should have seen this coming? I feel a sleep with tear stained pillows but at least I got to sleep. When I woke the house was quiet. I looked out the window and Jamal's car was gone. My heart sank a little more. He couldn't even face me about it? Tears swelled up and started to pour down my face. I can't believe how stupid and naive I've been. I thought relationships were happy and loving times not fights and drama! I hear a soft knock on my door and I open it to see my dad "you okay?' I bite my lip and nod "Hey Jamal left earlier said he was sorry. I take it you had a fight? He’s looked pretty miserable?" I nod and he hugs me "It's okay honey. We all have fights but we get through them and work it out. He'll figure it out sooner or later?" "Sooner or later might be too late dad" he nods "I know but remember you're my girl and I love you and I believe you'll always do the right thing no matter what!" I nod and he gives me a kiss on the cheek "Now go have a shower and be ready to go out?" 'Where?" "Helen, invited us out so we're going as a family!" i groan. Couldn't I stay home and mope? Nope I had to show my face in public and fake smile and act like everything is alright. "Fine, give me 20 minutes" "Okay" he walked off and I grabbed my towel and clothes and went to have a shower and change.
The day out with Helen was actually a breath of fresh air. She took us to the country and we rode a horse and feed animals. Emily loved it, she would squeal every time an animal ate from her hand, it was cute and seeing Helen and my dad holding hands and looking happier than ever made me smile. I hope one day that could be me. Happily in love with a family but right now that was looking doubtful. I went along with our happy little family day and when we finally came home I thanked Helen for a great day and excused myself to go to bed. I lay there staring up at the stars wondering what I was going to do or even say at school tomorrow. April and Lily were surely going to rub it in that Jamal came to the party and I was stood up? I sigh deeply and think - fuck my life! Just as I did my eyes felt droopy and I fell asleep. Soon it was Monday again and the usual routine started all over again. I got dressed and then woke up Emily, she seemed happy about school which made it easier to get her ready. I think she sensed something was wrong but didn't want to say anything so didn't. I waited for her bus before walking to mine. Jack and crew were there and I rolled my eyes when they saw me alone. Jack smirked as he walked my way "Well Brook, looks like it's just you and me again?" "Fuck off Jack!" I replied and he was a little taken back but when he looked into my eyes I'm sure he saw the gates of hell because he backed right off "Sure Brook. Let's do this another time shall we?" I watch as they retreat before I hear a familiar voice "Hey" I turn to see Jasper, he's all smiles as usual "Hey" i say in my down voice "So How did it go the other night with Jamal. Did he tell you where he was?" I look at him "At that fucking party with April and Lily. Those bitches!" he looks at me "Whoa, a little hasty and nasty there B. I'm sure there was a good enough reason?" "Nope, just that he went to give them a lift they were drinking, then he started drinking and then bang they were at the party getting drunk, time flew by while not giving a shit about me until he wanted sex and came looking for me" "What?' he asked concerned "Yeah, he asked if he could stay a while. I said yes and then he groped me on the step. I made him stop and sleep it off on the couch!" he chuckled "What! If I'd known that I wouldn't have left you with him. Are you okay?" he sounded so concerned that it made my heart skip a beat. Does Jasper like me or is he just being a good friend? The question I kept asking myself but I didn't know the answer. I know I'd kissed him before and seeing his beautiful blue eyes looking at me as worried as they were made me fall a little more for him and want Jamal a little less.
"I'm fine Jasp, really. He stopped and listened but he didn't hang around on Sunday morning. He was gone before i got up with a sorry from my dad from him. No phone call no message nothing!" I was getting worked up about it again and I knew I'd start crying so I fanned myself and took some deep breaths "Hey, it's going to be okay" he was hugging me and the tears were falling down and onto his shirt. He didn't seem to care as he comforted me while i was at my weakest moment. About 5 minutes later the bus arrived and we got on, no one dared say a word so the ride to school was quiet for a moment had everyone heard I'd been stood up for Toby’s party? How many were laughing at me right now? I bet everyone who was there and especially April and Lily! Jasper hugged me all the way to school until i finally stopped crying and we arrived at school. We got off and I looked at Jasper "How do I look?" "Like an emotional girl?" I looked up at him and he smiled, while wiping the tears from under my eyes "its okay. We all have bad days yours just happens to be today....Look if April or Lily annoy you I'll tell them to fuck off okay?" i giggled. Thinking of him telling them that and the look on their faces would be priceless so I nod "Good" he draped his arm over my shoulders and glided us towards our friends. Jamal was there sitting down with April by his side. I noticed the closeness straight away and it hurt. Was there something going on between them but what was I missing? I ignored my feelings for now and let Jasper walk us over. Felix and Max looked first and they looked - I don't know how to explain it like we were foreigners and they didn't know us. It was weird "Hi guys" Jasper said dropping his arm from my shoulders "Hey, missed you at the party man" Felix bloated "Yeah sorry had to take a special someone out" I blushed a little at his compliment but remained quiet "Oh man, the party was off the hook hey Ja!" it was quiet and all eyes were on Jamal. Go say it you dickhead, say how much it was a great party while your girlfriend stood there like an idiot waiting for you! "Yeah man, it was off the chain" he said in a rude tone. I huffed and started to walk off "Brook, you missed it!" April says "Yeah well I was busy!" I keep walking away and Jasper catches up to me "Hey, don't let them get to you okay. They're a bunch of tards anyway?' i stop dead in my tracks and look at him "Did you just call my friends tards?' and he laughs "Yep, while unless you have a better name for them?" I shake my head "No tards works for me!' we laugh and walk off into the school.
