heartbreak girl | s.m.

6 | saying sorry

chapter playlist ⏯
• want you back - 5 seconds of summer
• perfectly lonely - john mayer
• rosie - john mayer

(ok i can do two john mayer songs if i want to this is my story so get out of my face about it)

—————
gemma clark <<<

My phone rang the next morning, which I knew it would. Jake.

"Hello?"

"Hey. What's up?"

"I just woke up. Might go get coffee. What about you?"

"Same. Minus the coffee part," he replied.

I didn't say anything else.

"Listen," he began. I could see him running his fingers through his curly hair and looking out the window. "I have no excuse for not calling you yesterday. I really was busy filming and everything, but I should have made the time for you. I wasn't thinking straight. I wasn't thinking that you would be worried about me. I should have been thinking, I know."

True.

"I'm sorry, Gem. I really am. I told you I was going to be better, and then I go and pull this," he said. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

"I know. You always say that," I replied.

"I mean it."

"Then change, please. I'm tired of hearing it."

"I know."

I didn't say anything for a moment.

"You tell me you don't want me to leave but you give me a million reasons to, Jake. It's kinda frustrating."

"I know. I'm really, really trying."

Try fucking harder.

I didn't want to have this conversation anymore. I can't deal with it.

"I've got things to do. I'll talk to you later."

"Okay. Love you."

"Bye."

I hung up. How can someone be so infuriating?

Although, it has been a few weeks since the incident at the club, and this is the first time that he has really screwed up since then. I would say he's improving, which is good.

I scrolled through my Instagram, still laying in my bed. Pictures of happy people. I sighed. Another day in the life, I guess. I finally sat up in my bed, then glanced out the window. You couldn't even tell that it had rained last night; the sun was shining brightly and it looked like just as good a day as any other.

I got changed into leggings and a sweater, the usual uniform of Gemma Clark on a Friday. Ponytail. Makeup. Converse. I grabbed my keys and my bag.

Coffee, then class. The usual.

I was early to class, which was rare. I pulled out my phone and decided to text Shawn and say sorry. I feel bad for last night. He was only trying to help me.