Captured ||Kylo Ren X Reader||

🌙XVII🌙

You'd now gone four days without being outside. Not that you cared, as you spent your time pondering inside your room about what the hell was going on

You had no idea! One minute you were a prisoner, the next you were crushing on Kylo. It was all one huge roller coaster of emotions and events, and you had no idea if you could take it any longer.

But, you couldn't find the strength to leave. You knew that if you tried you probably could, but something told you to stay. Was it the calling of being the Supreme Leaders mistress?

No. You wanted absolutely nothing to do with him after what he put you through. How he showed no sign of humanness while he pulled the thoughts from your brain, how he jumped from anger to possessiveness in a matter of seconds. You couldn't take it, you hated him all over again.

But at the same time you couldn't keep him off of your mind.

That of which you couldn't keep yourself from thinking about him. His long black hair, his warm and cold fingers, his soft and cushiony lips, or his undeniable juvenile crush on you.

Your only love born from your only hatred.

At times when you were alone locked in your chambers, you'd contemplate going to see him in his own. You knew for a face that he would be astonished and completely elated to see you, but not only did he have a wife, but he also tried to kill you. Like, five times.

During the few and far between moments when your mind wandered from Kylo, it traveled to Parnia, your supposed 'aunt' from Chandrilla. You knew you had family somewhere in the galaxy, but from the minute information you had on either of your parents you couldn't recall any links to power.

You didn't want a family, for that matter. Which is why you stormed out when Parnia claimed to be a relative. Unless it had something to do with power or money, you couldn't stand the thought of a family. More people to lose, to hurt, to die. You knew how it all worked. And even then, the girl was obviously nothing more than a slave. A professionally dressed one nevertheless, but obviously some kind of servant.

You recalled hearing somewhere of your mothers maiden name being used in a title of power. Princess Almardria. You remembered the shivers down you back when you heard the name, even if it had come from a cantina rug rat who spoke broken English. Mind you, this instance occurred when you were seventeen, still young and juvenile in your training as a Bounty Hunter and still in the mindset of a teenager, wanting to have a family.

For the longest time, you searched dozens of systems, thousands of planets, dug through millions of books, and had meetings with millions of political figures. Through it all, there was no word of a Princess Almardria. Its like she didn't exist. Or as if your mind had fooled you into believing there was still somebody out there, somebody who could still return.

Which is why you hypothesized you hated loving Kylo so much. He was the only human you'd had the most contact with since you were working endless hours on Coruscant, which was years ago. It was bad enough that you had no idea how to love anything, and worse that he didn't know how to either. You wanted him back, there was no doubt about it, but you couldn't risk him hurting you again. You couldn't trust him anymore.

|•|

I gripped the vessel of a neon tinted green poison tight in my hands, and when I came to the realization that I had been standing there for minutes, I finally wrapped my fingers around its glass container and hid it under my cleavage. It was far from a classy motive, but it worked like a charm.

"My dear seller," I looked up at the Twi'Lek who shot me a confused expression and moved her weight to one foot. "I thank you with everything I have." I held my hands close to my chest cordially, but she just rolled her eyes

"Princess, I don't care. Do you have what I asked for?" She sounded annoyed but I did as she asked and pulled out the Bounty Hunters blaster, in which the seller had requested.

She snapped it out of my hands and studied it, twirling it around and admiring every rough and oxidized part of it. I personally found it disgusting. "This will stay in confidence."

~

I arrived back at the Star Destroyer without being searched. The first time one of the guards put their hands on me, I ordered for it to never happen again. I knew it was late, but I also knew Kylo was not back in our quarters yet. He always came back so late, it was as if I never made his acquaintance. There was no schedule for work in the First Order because it wasn't a job. It was a task, and the First Order needed all the soldiers they could get.

And yet, I still barely saw my husband. Not that I cared for it much. I thought, for the first few weeks that I arrived here, that I could fall in love with him. I soon came to realize he is not only impossible to love, but is incapable of loving. Again, the realization didn't phase me. I knew why he married me from the start- he wanted a child with Force Sensitivity. I had not only that, but I was a Princess of a planet that the First Order, at the time, had no power of.

I sometimes wondered if he was falsed into marrying me. When he became known that I was not a Jedi, rather just a being whom the force brushed with the tips of it's fingers, he seemed angry. He was always angry at something. At Snoke, at Hux, at the Bounty Hunter, His Family, Me. He was always somehow angry with me.

Not that I had done anything to make him happy with me. His approval is not a priority of mine.

I'm only twenty six. I'm wasting all of my years that are supposed to be filled with happiness and love with a man who only visits me when he wants to try for a child.

I still recall the look on his face when I confessed I could not bear the Force Sensitive children he wants me too. He looked like he had come to the realization that he had wasted all of his time with me. As I've said, he only saw me when he wanted to try.

I still love Braden. I had to remind myself that I was doing this for him. For my people. For the 'New Alliance' that was fortuned to erupt from the ashes of the republic. If this New Alliance was as strong as it was said to be, it was possible the galaxy could be free of the First Order. Freedom, once again.

I made my way through the long corridors, knowing my long dress was trailing behind me. Honestly, I despised the dress. It was grey and ugly, the kind a Sith Queen would wear. I remember my attire on Melanie, everything was always light and beautiful and full of adolescence. The nations colors were gold and Navy blue, and all formal attire was the same. I apologize, I go off on tangents regularly.

I punched the button that slid open the chamber doors and immediately made my way inside. I hurried to find myself a cup, and carelessly filled it with tap water. It didn't matter. He was going to die anyway. I reached into my breasts and pulled out the Elixir, unplugging the wooden cork and holding it in my teeth as I flooded the water with the bright green poison.

At first, I was petrified. The water had stayed the glowing green for a moment, but quickly disintegrated into the water, leaving it with its normal clear color.

It was over. He was going to die, and I was going to be free.