Chasing Ghosts [Attack on Titan](Wattys 2014 Winner)

Chapter fifty-eight- Confessions.

Chapter fifty-eight

He chuckled and ruffled my hair with his hand “Does this mean we're official?” I nodded slowly, I was still pretty cold from riding though the snowy forest so I huddled up to him burring face into the ruffle around his neck. Levi chuckled “C'mon, you’re probably cold.” He said. I followed the ebony haired boy inside we went up to my room and I flopped down on my bed the second my feet hit the wooden floor of my little humble room. I cuddled up with the blanket putting my hands across my face and laying on my chest. Levi chuckled softly sitting down at my desk, I peeked at him under my long eyelashes. He was reading one of the journals. Had it been any other person, I would have smacked them across the face but I felt like it was alright if he read them. Levi flipped through the pages, he stopped reading after a minute. “Your mother had a great fascination with roses… I wonder if she knew she was going to be having a red-haired daughter…” He muttered. I said nothing taking a soft breath. “I don’t know, she died when I was born… I don’t know if she even got to see me.” He said nothing for a long while. “Hm…” He re-opened the journal and continued to read. “She sounds like she would have been an wonderful woman to be around.” He said.

I remained silent as he set down the book and stood up. He went to the door and to my surprise locked it. “What are you doing?” I asked as he closed the blinds that covered the window. Levi grinned at me and crawled onto the bed beside me. I fidgeted moving away from him. “Levi, you're scaring me.” I hissed. He continued to smirk as he pinned me against the bed. “You know I would never hurt you.” He said. I frowned at him, not wincing away from his intense glare. “Since your mine now, I can do whatever I like.” I narrowed my eyes and lifted my chin. “No, you can’t.” I said. He laughed softly “You sure about that?” I rolled my eyes “Stop it, you’re just putting on an act.” He laughed and kissed the bridge of my nose. “Well, you said yourself you loved me… so this shouldn't hurt too much…” he began to reach for my shirt when I realized what he was trying to do. I swung my knee up and got him in the crotch. Levi cried out and crumpled onto of me his head landing in-between my breasts. “Get off!” I demanded. He whimpered as I shoved him off of me. “Levi, I thought you were a better person then that!” I spat at him. He just whimpered in pain and managed to struggle out the words “I was going to see if you were going to let me, I wasn't actually going to do anything!” He said threw gritted teeth. I sighed loudly “Well, you don’t just pin a girl down like that.” I said.

He just whimpered in response. I sat down and folded my legs on the edge of the bed away from him… I'd never been with a man. Never had the desire to. I was to busy to think about something like that, I was fighting titans... not making love. Levi eventually recovered and sat up glaring at me in silence for a minute. I didn't want to look at him, what he'd said had got me to thinking… but those thoughts are private and I'd rather not be thinking about them in the first place. I looked at him, raising my eyebrow in irritation. He shook his head and moved over to me. Putting his arms around me and pulling me into his lap he sighed burring his face into my scarlet hair. “If you're going to be my wife, you'll have to be ready.” He chuckled quietly into my ear. I rolled my eyes. “I may be in my twenties but that doesn't mean I want kids.” I said to him. Levis hot breath rolled down the nape of my neck and it gave me the cold sensation of shivers. “Well… Are you a virgin?” He asked. I winced at that word. “Yes.” I sputtered. He laughed quietly. “Are you?” I felt him shake his head. “No.” I rolled my eyes and said nothing folding my arms across my chest. “Piffit…” was all I could muster. “You mean to tell me, you've never thought about it?” He asked me whispering sedulity into my ear. I rolled my eyes again “No.” he laughed again. “I doubt that, all woman have desires. Even you, hard-hearted you.”

I frowned “You’re a dip-shit.” I said. He laughed again “I know.” I smiled at his words “I'm glad your aware of that.” I turned myself around to look at him, I fidgeted with the ruffles around his neck. They were off-center and it was bothering me. He looked at me in silence as my legs where whapped around his back, I hadn't even noticed it. I continued to play with his little ruffles I continued on to fix his jacket and then I brushed the hair out of his eyes. His hair reminded me of the texture of velvet. It was soft and smooth, perfectly messy. He had the cute little bowl-like hair cut with the side-burns and his hair was shaved off just a couple Inches above the nape of his neck to give him the military cut look. I played with his hair for a while longer then I looked him in the eyes. Levis eyelashes where very long, something one wouldn't notice from a distance but once you got close they where long and ebony black… very beautiful. He tipped his head at me and said nothing, he brushed a long red lock of hair out of my face and I blushed slightly. It was a simple but sweet gesture. He moved to kiss me, I thought it was going to be a quick peck but he went for the full out ‘no rules’ kiss. His lips moved on mine and they tasted of cinnamon. I felt my mouth part ever slightly and the kiss grew even more he was ferociously kissing me almost like a wild animal with a piece of meat.  

When he pulled away a little bit of salvia dribbled off his tongue, not enough to make it gross but just enough to make him look incredibly sexy for about five seconds. He grinned at me. “I'm an experienced kisser if I do say so myself.” I blushed and said nothing. He laughed “Your so strange Alya, you can be head-strong sometimes but sometimes you’re a blushing idiot with nothing to say.” I frowned at his chest and said nothing. “Humph… Maybe so… but I'm not a brooding idiot.” He rolled his eyes “That’s true.” There was a knock at the door and the door-knob jiggled. “Alya?” Came Erwins voice. “Coming!” I said, quickly opening the blinds and shoving Levi off my bed he scrambled into the chair and opened a book. I went to it and unlocked the door, when I pushed it open Erwin had a very skeptical look in his eyes. He looked past me and at Levi who turned around and gave the blond haired commander a mocking wave. Erwin said nothing and remained stone faced. “Alya, we need to speak. Come to my office…” He turned and left curtly. I shrugged at Levi who had moved back to the bed and spralled out like he owned the place.

 I followed the commander up the hallway and into his room in the corner of the wing. “Well?” I asked folding my arms and leaning on the door-frame. He turned to look at me, a serious expression his face. “Your relationship with Levi worries me, tell me… what is he to you?” He asked. I narrowed my eyes. “I love him.” That got Erwins attention, the golden haired man looked up in surprise nearly dropping the cup that he had grabbed to put some vodka in to. “Your dating him?” He asked. I shrugged “I wouldn't say that.” He said noting and narrowed his eyes walking over to me. “Alya…” He shut the door behind me forcing me to walk into his chest. I struggled to move and turned my head to the right. “I loved you first, this doesn't seem fair.” I gasped. “What?”