I'm Just His Foster Sister [#1] // o2l au

Twenty

Everyone just left. The boys are going to a radio hall for an interview and Ken and Stasia are going to the mall.

I walk to Connor's bathroom and pull out Anastasia's bag of toiletries. I steal a razor: 1 of 100, and walk to my bathroom.

The thing about a razor to the skin, the way it feels, what most people don't understand is that, basically, your just giving yourself more pain but forgetting about the pain that caused you to take such actions. As the blood flows down, it's all you can focus on and it leaves you.. well it leaves me hypnotized. I forget everything that can, will, and has happened and I just watch the blood.

I lock the door behind me, undress, fill the tub with water, and get in while concentrating on not tricking myself out of what I'm about to do.

I turn the water off and I hear the words my dad told me. Well when I went into a coma because Ricky came to the house and I had a dream that God was going to send me to hell or at least that's what my parents told me. they said it was because I was dealing with my problems the wrong way, but they never got the chance to help me deal with them properly.

I put the razor to my stomach and slide it across. I do this about 20 times then toss the razor in the waste basket. The pain makes me cringe but frees me from my current reality. the blood and water swirls causing a cone of colors to form. Light red, deep red, pink, and clear.

I hear a door open downstairs and begin to panic. I jump out of the tub, earning a stinging sensation on my stomach because of the cuts coming in contact with oxygen so quickly. Grabbing a towel, unplugging the tub, and running into my room only caused the burning to intensify; even though my room and bathroom are connected, it was still painful.

Someone starts walking up or down the stairs, I cannot tell. I lock my bedroom door and then lock the bathroom door that lead to the hall and start to dress myself.

I choose a pair of black leggings, a white muscle tee with the 5SOS logo, I put just a black sports bra under the tee, and tie my hair up into a bun. I throw on a pair of socks and open my drawer for a bandage.

The bandage is big enough to cover my new inflictions and it light enough to not show from under my shirt. I put it on and walk out of my room to Sam running around the house looking for something. "Hey little butterfly! mind helping me look for my wallet, the boys and my passes for the interview are in it and we're gonna be late if I don't find it," he yells at me from down stairs as he ransacks the couch cushions.

"Yeah, I'll check the laundry room. it's probably in your pants pocket or something," I laugh at him, "you still gonna keep calling me butterfly?" He nods yes at my question, continuing his search.

"Well you at least tell me how I've adopted this creaturistic nickname?" I smile as he comes up stairs and walks with me to the laundry room.

The laundry room is the size of 2 full bathrooms out together. it has 8 bins, one for each of the members of the house, there is an 8th occasionally when we have guests. each bin has it's own color and sign, the sign has a name and whatever that person decided to decorate it with.

Mine was a pink bin with my name in bubble letters with music notes and ballet shoes around it.

Connor's was an orange bin with his name in cursive and cats, pizza, and cameras surrounding it.

Ricky's was blue with his name in block letters and Pokémon characters and creatures around it.

Trevor's was a green bin with his name written in his messy scrawl and music notes around it.

Jc's was a yellow bin with his name made out of pictures of him, the boys, and I, surrounding it was hearts and smiley faces.

Kian and Sam shared a bin because they constantly borrowed each other's stuff. Their bin was white with "Ki & Sam" written in cursive identical to Connor's. around it were different pictures of them together.