Shawn Mendes one shots

Almost

I had almost run towards her room when Geoff met me in the hallway as I returned home from the studio, telling me she wasn't in such a good mood today. Usually y/n loved a good old night with friends, vodka shots and beer pong but apparently, she hadn't left her room all night.

Feeling the knot in my stomach grow and the lump that appeared in my throat, I knocked gently on her door before pushing it open and entering the messy room.

"Hey, why are you laying in here? The party is out there, you know?" I tried joking slightly, seeing a blurry silhouette laying on the bed in the otherwise dark room.

Her back was towards me and even though her sobs were rather silent, her entire body was vibrating from her heavy crying. Watching her all curled up in her bed made her seem so tiny to me. It made my heart shatter deeply just looking at her like this and I couldn't even see her face.

"I'll be out in a second" she muttered, her sore voice cracking over as the sobs replaced her stuttering words.

"I'll keep you company until then" I said as I carefully swung my legs into the bed and laid down next to her.

She didn't move to face me which made it sting inside my chest. I hated when she tried hiding her sadness instead of sharing it with so I could help.

My hands reached for her side as I flipped her around, forcing her to finally face me. My heart dropped into my stomach and suddenly I felt like, I could throw up at any possible second.

She seemed unrecognizable to me as she laid here in front of me completely caught up in her heavy crying. Her otherwise warm and friendly face was pale and she seemed drained for emotions. Her lips were dry and brittle. Her eyes red and swollen and the tears continued to silently run down her swollen face. She had by far given up on wiping them away but I don't think she cared anymore.

Despite having been friends with her for years, living together and being each other's person to lean on, I had never really seen her crying as hard as she was right now. And I felt completely helpless at the sight.

"I'm sorry" she whispered in pain as she buried her sore face in her palms, obviously trying to hide her pain from me.

"Hey, don't. Don't say sorry" I stuttered quickly.

I hated when she apologized for showing emotions, I hated that she apologized for being vulnerable and simply human. She always thought she had to be so damn perfect all the fucking time.

My fingers wrapped around her shaking hands and I gently removed them from her face, wiping a tear or two away from her quivering but plump lips.

"What's going on?" I asked softly, my eyes burning on hers.

She managed to pull a tiny smile but shrugged as she tried hiding the massive amount of pain clearly written all over her sad face.

I found it strange how she still - after all these years - thought she could hide these things from me. As if I wouldn't notice or catch on to when something was tearing her apart. She was my best friend, I knew her better than anyone. I could always tell when something was bothering her, I always noticed.

My heart was pounding harshly against my chest and with every silent sob escaping her lips, my heart sank just an inch deeper and the pain turned up a notch.

"I'm right here, y/n. Talk to me"

"It's stupid."

My finger traced her jawline gently as I caught a tot of her wild hair and wrapped around the tip of my finger. Gently, I placed it behind her ear. She smiled at my loving gesture and somehow, a little laughter slipped out of her mouth. She pushed her hand under the pillow and continued looking at me.