love, anonymous

35

Trigger warning: sexual assault

Sira was wondering how she'd bring up the subject to Jimin without being too out of the blue. Fortunately for her, he brought it up himself.

He had asked her if she would visit his sister's grave with him, and Sira had gladly accepted, feeling honoured that he trusted her enough to let her meet the most important person in his life.

She was to meet him at the campus gates, and was considerably early.

Jimin showed up soon enough and they made their way to the cemetery. The journey was silent, but not awkward. It was a comfortable silence, with both of them completely aware of each other, but reflecting on themselves.

Sira's thoughts were all over the place; she couldn't phrase how she was going to tell him about the accident. Would their relationship be the same afterwards?

Her anxious thoughts came to a standstill as her and Jimin reached their destination.

Jimin kneeled down at Jiyeon's grave, placing a bouquet of flowers nearby. Kneeling beside Jimin, Sira rested her hand on his shoulder comfortingly.

Jiyeon's tombstone was shining amongst the others; having been varnished gold.

Jimin was melancholic, remembering how he had once read her diary and found out more about her; her hopes and dreams and how she wanted her wedding to be. Even how she wanted a golden tombstone so that her 'highlight was poppin even though she wasn't'.

Sira, however, was distracted. There were numerous flowers, cards and notes at Jiyeon's tombstone, but one of them caught her attention. Carefully lifting the pile of memorabilia, she deftly prised out the card.

Jimin looked at her curiously, waiting for her to explain.

Looking at the card; at the handwriting on the front, Sira smiled bitterly. At least he had some semblance of a conscience.

She handed the card to Jimin, who was surprised by the personalised notepaper, bearing a name he had never heard of.

"Jimin, I know you're probably curious about why I reacted the way I did," Sira started,"and I'm going to tell you."

Taking a deep breath, Sira spoke,"I was involved in your sister's accident."

Pausing, she waited for Jimin's reaction, but he merely raised his eyebrows.

"Okay, go on."

Slightly shocked, Sira continued,"The night of the accident, I was on a date with my boyfriend. He was going to drop me home, but on the drive back, he -"

Sira stopped. Unable to say it, unable to relive it again.

Jimin put an arm around her, knowing that the memory wasn't a pleasant one, and was painful to recount.

Tears stinging her eyes, Sira swallowed against the lump in her throat before continuing,"He molested me and violated me. He was driving too, and when I tried to stop him, the steering wheel was getting jerked around. The car was swerving all over the place and..."

Jimin's eyes widened. His arms loosened from her and his breathing was shallow

"After the crash, he - he was conscious, but he didn't - he didn't do anything. He didn't call the police or the ambulance. He dragged me out and left me on the road and he didn't even check on the other car."

"That card you're holding, it's from him. That stupid personalised notepaper that he uses for every letter."

Jimin was shocked, to say the least.

"The drunk driver whom the police couldn't find...you knew him? Did you even report him for what he did?" Jimin questioned, still feeling breathless.

"I did, but he never got apprehended. Apparently there's no evidence."

Jimin fell back onto the grass, laying on his back. His hands creased the card, not wanting to open it.

He laughed dryly.

"Is it normal to feel bloodlust towards someone you haven't met? This guy, this bastard, has already hurt two people I love. I don't even know how I feel right now."

Sira lay beside him, tears trickling down her face.

"I haven't seen him since that day, but if I did, I wouldn't let him walk away in one piece."

Closing his eyes, Jimin reached out for Sira's hand, entwining their fingers.
»»-----　♡　-----««

Your hands look heavy, let me hold them for you.

♤♤♤
I'm sorry for the late update. I haven't been feeling okay recently and didn't want to give you guys a half-hearted chapter.

Thank you so much for all your votes and especially comments, because they really make my day. Nowadays I always feel like shit because all my close friends are finding other friends and I just feel so replaceable.

This is year is important for me as I have O Levels, but honestly I have no more motivation to study. All my family talks to me about is 'go study' 'how could you [literally anything else] ?! you should be studying'. I feel like they don't care about me or even know me as a person.

There are so many amazing things in the world but I'm wasting a whole year locked up in my room studying for some stupid test that won't be significant in a few years. To me, I'm wasting my life. And I feel like shit.

I can't even write because my parents are always hovering around. They don't know I write and I don't even want to tell them because the only thing they'd do is make me stop. 'because it's a distraction'

I want to improve my drawing. I want to learn a new language. I want to do so many more things but I can't.

Or in my parents words, 'not this year'. HAHA it's not going to be any different next year and I know it. This is why I can't wait to move out