Dan & Phil Oneshots

All Hands on Deck

(Dan's POV)

"Hello, welcome aboard... Hello welcome aboard..."

"Smile through the pain," I thought as I greeted each and every passenger boarding the cruise ship. This is always my least favorite part of working on a cruise ship, especially one of high caliber. I briefly made eye contact with my friend, Bryony, across the line of boarding passengers. She widened her eyes and gritted her teeth in a "please get me out of here" way before going back to a neutral yet happy expression. 

Person after person filed on board, smiling and looking around the spacious main room right inside the entrance. It was a really nice lobby, I must admit. The upper bedrooms were connected to walkways that only came out about five feet from the wall, leaving the center of the room to extend from the lobby to the skylight ceiling. There was a fancy chandelier hanging down in the center, fluffy couches and armchairs, a bar, tvs, and an outdoor balcony. All of the other fun stuff was on the upper levels. 

I felt the heat of the day seeping into my cobalt blue and white uniform, making me twitch and shuffle in attempt to not pass out. I looked spiffy as heck, but beauty is pain. Once all of the guests were in, the row of cruise employees broke apart and we went to our assigned areas. Bryony and I were in charge of the kid's daycare center today, which would most likely be painful and torturous. 

"Why did we agree to do this?" I asked as we met up and started walking to the elevators. "Because we didn't. We put on our resumes that we've had experience with kids and they automatically put us in the daycare." I sighed and pressed the up button, waiting for one of the elevators to open. The ride up was spent kvetching about kids and today's job, but we succumbed to silence once the doors open, not wanting to spoil the happy atmosphere for the guests. 

"Doors open in 30 minutes," PJ said as we entered the building. I thanked him before finding a spare water bottle by the front desk and cracking it open. "Crack open a cold one with the boys," I told Bryony before taking a sip, causing her to laugh. "Don't be drinking in front of the kids or we'll lose our jobs." "It's not like it's vodka or anything." "But vodka's also clear," PJ chimed in with a wink. 

"Now that's an idea," Bry replied as she took a bottle for herself. PJ flicked on the lights in the play area and checked to make sure all supplies was properly stocked. I grabbed a sharpie and wrote my name on the bottle before storing it behind the desk. The last few minutes before opening were spent in quiet bliss, knowing that we wouldn't get a break from the noise until 7pm tonight. Ugh. 

"Time," PJ groaned as he walked to the front of the room, unlocking the door and allowing the hoard of parents and kids to enter. Immediately, the noise hit us like a mallet. Screaming, crying, laughing, shrieking, etc. all bombarded us as we stood behind the front desk and wrote down names. 

"Pickup at 7pm tonight," I reminded a rather oblivious-looking woman who plopped her chubby toddler in the play area before leaving. Bryony was already over there watching over a few kids. I decided to leave PJ to take care of the desk and help her once a particularly rowdy kid decided to chuck a Duplo at her. 

"No no. We do not do that here," I said as Bry put the red Duplo back in the box. The brat laughed and picked up another, chucking it at me. "That's it," I said as I took away the Duplos. The kid looked furious and lunged towards me as I moved the Duplos a great distance away from him. He didn't make it far since he was very young and settled for sitting next to the train toys. 

"No! We do not eat sand!" I heard Bry say as I walked over to two kids fighting over a teddy bear. "Here! Do you guys like this one?" I said as I held up a slightly bigger bear. The two kids stopped and stared at the bear in wondrous curiosity before snatching it from my grasp. Each claimed their own bear, effectively dissolving the argument.