The Text

Chapter 4

From: My Bestie! :D

'Grayson talked to me!! He said that I looked nice tonight!! :) OMG!!! The thing is, I'm just wearing some shorts, a T-shirt, and socks. And I'm not wearing any makeup. I wonder if he was lying just to make me feel good about myself....'

I was laying in bed crying myself to sleep when I got this message about two minutes ago. I haven't replied yet because I'm still trying to wipe all of the dried tears away. My parents left the house an hour or so ago to hang out at a crappy bar in town. They're always getting wasted and coming home ready to beat and yell at me again. I shouldn't be, but I'm used to it.

'He was being honest, Lindsey. He's not the type of guy to lead you on. If he said it, he meant it.' I replied, trying to make her believe him.

'You're right. Grayson is a nice guy and he's my brothers best friend. He wouldn't lie to me.'

'He has no reason to. You're beautiful. You look good in anything.' I text back, trying to boost her confidence.

'Aww! ;) That's so sweet! You're beautiful too, Chloe. Any guy would be lucky to call you their girlfriend.'

Yeah right. No guy would ever want to be seen with me.

'Yeah...Thanks. Well I'm tired. I'll talk to you tomorrow at school. Don't miss the bus like you did last Wednesday. You don't wanna have to walk four miles again.'

Lindsey tends to miss the bus. She takes so long doing her hair and makeup to impress Grayson that she forgets to check the time. Her parents offered to buy her a car, but she refused. She wants to pay for it herself. She's been saving up money since school started and she almost has enough. Lindsey has a part time job cleaning houses in her neighborhood. She offered to clean mine, but of course I told her she couldn't. This time for an excuse, I told her it was because my mom likes to clean it herself so she knows it's clean. She bought it like always.

'I will NEVER make that mistake again. I'm pretty sure my feet hate me. Lol. See you at school. Goodnight. XOXO'

And just like that, I'm back to my horrible thoughts. By the time I actually fall asleep, my parents will get home and wake me up. I never get a good nights sleep. I have black bags under my eyes all the time. Lindsey sometimes calls me a zombie. She thinks I just have insomnia.

Yeah....I wish.

That would be better than what I actually have to deal with. Even though I live in a nightmare, I wouldn't trade places with anyone. I don't want anyone else to have to go through what I have to go through. I'm not sure if anyone else could take it. I've dealt with it my whole life so I've grown strong, but if someone like Lindsey spent a day in my shoes, she would break down. She might even kill herself. I hate to admit it, but I've actually thought about doing that a few times. Now I know that killing myself won't help anything. Yeah I'll be free of the abuse, but I would hurt people in the process. Lindsey needs me and I need her. I still have things to live for. Suicide is not the answer.

Lindsey told me that I can buy as many songs as I want on the play store. I don't know many songs and she hates that. She says music can save many lives. Songs can touch people that need it. I only know a few bands and singers because Lindsey forced me to listen to them at lunch. So far, I like the bands One Republic, The Script, Maroon 5, Imagine Dragons, Nickleback, and 3 Doors Down. Those are the only bands she made me listen to. Their songs have so much meaning behind them. I can feel the emotion their song is portraying. She also made me listen to a boy band that apparently is pretty famous, but I didn't really care for them. There's a few songs of theirs that I like. Story of my Life and You and I are great songs.

I scrolled through some of the artists and this woman named Christina Perri caught my eye. One of her song titles is Human. Without listening to it, I bought it. I read a few of the lyrics and they were amazing.