(warning; suicide)
☁︎
S t i l e s
The scar, the scar I tried so hard to hide was there visible to everyone. Her name engraved on my arm. She just stared at it; eyes overflowing with tears.
I pulled my arm from her grasp making me wince, and start running, running far away, running from everything, running from her.
How could she do that.
I jumped into my jeep tears still visible and drove so fast home. Once I had arrived I ran up to my room, but I didn't cry, I didn't shout, I didn't cut. I just stood there contemplating what to do next.
I go into the bathroom where lay a tub of antidepressants, I had them for when my mom died. I grabbed the tub slamming it onto the counter.
I stared at it.
And stared at it.
And stared at it.
I went back into my bedroom grabbed a piece of paper and a pen and started to write.
'Dear Dad' I cross it out.
'Dear friends' I cross that out as well.
'Dear people' I scrunch up the paper and throw it at the wall with a groan.
'Goodbye my love' I start to write.
'I'm tired, I'm tired of being pushed around. I'm tired of being the victim. Being the damaged one. Or the destroyer. I've tried and tried and tried to fight threw it; but what's the point when your only fighting against yourself. What's the point if you have nothing to gain. What's the point if you keep losing.'
Dad, I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm such a disappointment. I'm sorry that you got stuck with me and most of all. I'm sorry for killing mom, you always said it was my fault but I never believed you, well I do now.
Scott, I'm sorry for not being the brother you needed nor wanted, I'm sorry for you not being there for you, Issac, Allison or Cora.
Lydia, I'm sorry for hurting you, I'm sorry for ignoring you, I'm sorry for destroying you, and I'm sorry for breaking your heart. But most of all I'm sorry for not telling you I loved you when I know I did.
I'm sorry, but it's too late.
Goodbye.
I wipe of the tears that had fallen from my eyes, I place the note neatly on my bed. I walk back into the bathroom and look at myself in the mirror.
1 pill.
2 pill.
3 pill.
4 pill.
5 pill.
6 pill.
7 pill.
8 pill.
9 pill.
10 pill.
I carry on taking more and more until the tub is empty. I feel my eyes become heavy and theres not much I can do before the black abyss takes over and...
bang, I am dead.
☁︎
S c o t t
I still can't comprehend what has just happened it's not like Stiles to do this so, me and Allison are going to his house.
I pull up to his house and jump out of the car, I knock on the door but get no answer; repeating this over and over again, still nothing. I grab the spare key from under the plant pot and unlock the door.
"Stiles! Stiles! Stiles!" I repeatedly shout.
"Wait, what's that." It sounds like the faucet. We rush upstairs and into his room, I see the bathroom door open a crack. I walk towards it and gently push open the door to see.
Allison fell to her knees in tears and shock. I just stand there looking at the lifeless body that is my best friend. I run towards him, turning him over to see if he's breathing.
"Allison, Allison! Check the pulse." I say and she quickly moves and grabs his wrist tears falling down her face.
"It's faint, Scott. We need to get him to a hospital, now!" I pick up his lifeless body and carry it down stairs and into the car.
I've never drove so fast in my life, someone's life was in my hands but not just anyone's life, my best friend, my brothers life.
Once we got there, I slammed on the brakes and threw myself out of the door to collect Stiles unresponsive body.
"Help! Help! Please somebody help me!" I shouted tears now streaming down my face.
"Scott?" Someone says.
"MOM! Help please." She looks at Stiles and start to shout at the other doctors to get him on a gurney. A man took my brothers body out of my arms.
"What happened Scott?" My mom asked.
"I-I d-don't k-know, h-he overdosed." I could barley speak, Allison was gripping onto my side, scared if she'd let go she'd break.
"I-I need to call his D-Dad."
"Scott, Allison sit down the hospital will take care of that, he's going to be fine, I promise." My mom reassured as she ran off.
I guided Allison to the waiting room where we sat and waited. She broke the silence by handing me a letter.
"I f-found it, on h-his bed." I gently took the letter from here and began to read, tears streaming down my face as well as Allison's; pulling out my phone and began to dial a number.
"Hello?" A perky girl said.
"Lydia? Stiles has been in a accident." The line went dead.
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V o t e &
C o m m e n t
- this was a really hard chapter to write, so if you or anyone you know are struggling with something similar talk to someone you trust or feel free to message me, I may not know you but I would never judge. I could probably put I smile on your face thanks to my wittiness and sarcasm ;). But please always talk to someone, your never alone.<3
em☁︎
