Being Next to You - Always there

rina - his friends & his brother

     Two month passed.
     Nothing changed with our plain relationship between me and Julian.
     We go home together after class, he helps me in my studies when we go to the library. Julian doesn't only watch me when I'm busy reading. I don't know why, but he tells me that he will wait for me until I finished my book.
     "I'll be taking my time again..."
     "It's okay. I can wait, Rina."
     Julian next beside me. Suddenly, I felt there's something on my hand.
     He's holding my hand again.
     "Umm... Julian... We're in the library— so this is kinda—..."
     I can't think straight.
     "Why are you holding my hand?" I asked him.
     He said, "This is normal, Rina. I have no particular reasons why. Did my answer satisfy you?"
     "Yep."
     But I never finish the books I read in the library it. I can't concentrate knowing that he is watching me. He always sits next to me, reading a random book or maybe doing his assignments.
     I like the look in his eyes when he is busy. He reminds me of my older brother— a bit.
     "Is something wrong?" He noticed my stare.
     I looked away. "N-Noth-i-ing..," I stuttered. I blocked my face that Julian was trying to see.
     He was still trying.
     "Please stop..," I muttered, face apple red.
     "Oh? Sorry." Julian set a distance, however, this scenario became normal over a past month. I became less awkward around him— a bit.
     Yet the distance with my friends was still there.
     Lunch break. I saw them eating in the classroom. I went to their place, saying something while hiding my lunchbox behind my back.
     "I-Is this seat free...?" My voice was trying to be brave. The look they had in their eyes were piercing.
     "Yeah, it's free," said Theresa, and I gladly sat next to her. And then, we began talking, starting with small questions until I can't keep up with their conversation.
     "Hey, Rina. You're good at English, right? Would you mind giving me a hand with my homework? I haven't done mine yet," Theresa called again, and I was very happy. I nodded my head with delight.
     I was glad that there was one person talking to me, and asking for my help. Yet, I can't help but notice that Sarah and Carol were aggravated to see me. I felt dejected.
     "How's your relationship with Julian?" Abruptly spoke Carol.
     "We're fine," I replied. Then there was that look again.
     It makes the atmosphere heavier.
     "Is that so?" She was beginning to bark. "Julian must really like you. Good for you, Rina," she added a smile.
     And it was unpleasant, but I had to respond back. I was scared. 
     "Yeah..."
     I can't muster myself to say "Thank you." I'm afraid that their smiles were real. It makes me uneasy. I feel wretched to think that I'm the culprit in creating this uneasy feeling around us.
      I want it to disappear. Is it me who has to disappear? Please, someone, tell me...!
     I slapped myself— literally.
     Tears began falling again because of the pain of my own slaps. I wiped my tears as I holed myself in the toilets. I made no sound, and I tried to think positive but it wasn't working. Taking deep breaths made it worst for me.
     I finally went out. My eyes were ruddy. I was carrying a book with me, so I went to the library to return it.
     BUMP.
     "I'M SORRY!!! I WASN'T WATCHING WHERE I WAS GOING!!"
     I apologized as I tried to stand from my fall.
     The person I bumped to, suddenly, stared at me.
     "HEY!!" He gasped, pointing fingers. "You're Julie's girlfriend!!"
     "Whoa! It is really Julian's girlfriend. It's a pleasure to meet you." Another man appeared. He gave me a warm smile and a helping hand.
     Another came. "Don't crowd her. Before you get too excited, let the librarian stand first, will you."
     This man here wears glasses and has short black hair. He sounds like he can be a leader of a certain class.
     The first one looks like a western. His hair color was like straw, his eyes are light blue, and the way he talks has an accent.
     The second one, rather, had a feminine figure and a feminine touch. I'm taller than him, and his curly black hair makes him- cute.
     Jude Bridge came along with the one with glasses.
     "Eh~ So she's a librarian. Who knew?" Jude bluntly said.
     I heard him, as I accepted one of their helping hands. Jude was really glaring, he was scanning all over my body. I was a little nervous and confused.
     "Did something happened to your eyes?" The feminine one tapped my shoulder, concerned to my eyes. I forgot that I cried, but this was not the place to say it...
     "I'm Sidney Rose, by the way," he reached his hand again. "We're Julian's friends. It's a pleasure to meet an acquaintance. And this is-"
     "CHARLES LOUIS BECQUER! BUT I'M CHARLIE, AND I'M HALF-FRENCH," he energetically interrupted.
     "My name is Kevin Glover, and this grumpy fella over here, is Jude Bridge."
     "Why did you introduce yourself to her? She's our enemy," Jude whispered to Kevin's ear, though, I can hear him...
     "It's nice to meet you all. I'm Rina Bookman," I introduced myself.
     "Bookman? That explains it, why she is so into books," said Jude.
     His tone was offending and rude.
     I don't know he wanted me to hear his statement or not.
     Kevin slaps Jude's head.
     Jude exclaims in pain. "OUCH. WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR? MY HEAD HURTS," he angered.
     "Good. You deserved it," Kevin responded back. They were beginning to fight, I panicked, I tried to change the atmosphere.
     "Ah! Umm, how did you know I was a librarian??" I suddenly asked.
     Kevin and Jude looked at me in a funny way.
     I heard the glasses one snorted. "That's easy. You used to work at the public library, right? I see you sometimes arranging the books when I go there to study."
     "You study in the library?? Who knew???" Surprisingly questioned Charles.
     "That's because I can never study properly when I'm with you guys," he annoyingly replied Charles.
     Watching them makes them look like great friends. I begin to envy Julian's friendship. Fighting, laughing, and joking around must be very nice...
     "Julian's very lucky to have good friends like you," I blurted out of nowhere. It had no place.
     "Thank you," replied Sidney.
     And I felt rest assured at that moment. I also realized that I needed to go to the library.
     "It's very nice meeting you all, but, I need to go," I excused myself, however, as I passed by Jude, he blocked my way and pinned me on the wall.
     "Where are you going? But I think I know where." He sighs to my ear, he whispered, "It must be nice being my brother's girlfriend, huh?" He was mischievously close to my face, and I pushed him away— very hard.
     "I'm sorry to be rude, but I'm going to the LIBRARY, thank you very much. I'll be excusing myself," I politely moved my way.
     It was similar, but not the same..!
     I'm shook. I'm very upset and irritated to Jude Bridge. I already knew that he doesn't like me, and I knew that their personalities are completely different— his character is the EXACT OPPOSITE of Julian's!
     HE'S SUCH A TERRIBLE JERK.