Being Next to You - Always there

julian - blue

      I'm amazed that it was this crowded.
     I guess a lot of people enjoys making things with their hands.
     I was never good in 'art n crafts.'
     My classmate told me that the library was doing a "DO-IT YOURSELF BOOKMARK BOOTH."
     I thought it was a good idea to bring Rina here...
     It is.
     But....
     How should I put it....
     'She is REALLY taking her time.'
     I already bought some mini-pancakes to keep me company.
     I liked how the pancakes are not too oily and sweet.
     Rina left her book with me to amuse me, but I wasn't in the mood to read.
     "Julian, which is better? Blue sand? Or blue glitters?"
     It was her seventh time to run back here at the bench to ask my preferences. Food and drinks aren't allowed in the library.
     I wonder if she wasn't tired yet...
     She is still wearing her Snow White dress. Though... it isn't a bad thing...
     "Rina, ahh~"
     I wanted to feed her.
     Ah. She ate it.
     "Rina."
     "What is it, Julian?" She asked.  
     I can't help, but stare at my hand...
     "Don't include my fingers next time... I don't like being sticky..," I scolded her, while wiping them with some tissue.
     She was cute.
     "Okay. So what do you like?" She asserted. She was like a big puppy. Her eyes were shining as waits for my answer, and I said:
     "Blue watercolor is better... It's not bulky and not that messy. I think I saw some on the table. Do you know how to use them?"
     "Yeah. It's the table where there are beads, right?"
     "Yeah," I answered.
     Yet I'm still a bit worried...
     At the window, I saw him.
     "Rina," I took her attention. I whispered on her ear, "Can you see that guy sitting, the one wearing a beige-colored cardigan?"
     She nodded.
     "That's the table. I'm sorry if you think that I don't trust you," I added.
     "Nah. You're just being careful. I think I'm more unpleasant than you are," she smiled, and then left, running in her dress again.
      I just hope she doesn't forget to be careful...
      I'm aware it was my idea...
      "Want to try making those?" is what I said to her earlier...
     SIGHED.
      I wonder why did I say that? Well, what's done is done.
      Then again, I wonder if it's the right time to make some bookmarks?
      I began staring at the sky as a few minutes passed, and then, more minutes passed.
      Rina quietly sat on that table. She was next to the boy wearing a cardigan.
     Honestly, I was bored.
     When I stared at Rina, my other eye takes a glimpse of her seatmate sitting over there.
      He is sure an eye-candy. His flowing curly blonde hair was similar to extravagant dolls. His skin has a pastel shade, but not as light as Rina's, and his blue almond-shaped eyes were something you don't see every single day.
      And for some reason, he was looking at her...
     'I don't know if I didn't like it.'
      When I look at the bandages on my right hand, I remembered Rina biting it an hour ago.
     It was just an hour ago, and yet a lot of things happened that I clearly cannot explain...
     Though, the only point I understood in her behaviour was that "she likes me."
     But...
     KISSES?
     BITING??
     AND LICKS???
     'What was SHE thinking?' is what popped out, and some other questions...
     I'm exhausted.
     I wanted to stay somewhere nice and quiet to clear my head. But gradually, I can feel my body aching because of the five hours of cooking and cleaning. And tomorrow, I needed to prepare again, but at least, it'll be only for two hours for the next two days unlike today.
      "The sky sure looks peaceful," I stared.
      I closed my eyes a bit.
      It was dark yet peaceful.
      I can breathe properly, but I recognized this pain in my body. If I'm right, it was last week when I brought Rina to my house.
     Now that I think about it, it's been a while since I've brought a girl. It's a good thing that nobody's home at that time, or mom and dad would tease me.
     I remembered making her some sandwiches for a snack. I was tired then, and lazy to cook something complicated.
     Ham, egg, cheese, and my favourite Japanese dressing.
     I think she liked it, and it kinda made me happy.
     I've also noticed that she was clean eater. Quick and neat. No bread crums to be seen. I was amazed because my brothers are a bit messy. After awhile, I went upstairs to change my clothes. I was very sweaty.
     I know that I planned to go down, but I was very tired.
     I laid down on my Jude's bed to rest since it was the nearest. I don't recall falling asleep.
      I remembered that it was also dark and peaceful.
     I remembered imagining the sea, it looks cold but comfortable.
    The view wasn't bad, it was very pleasant.
     The wind tasted salty yet refine—
     Wait.
     'Why was I able to TASTE that?'
     I felt my lips has a salty aftertaste.
     I remembered waking up in a dream. My eyes weren't that open. I am still unsure if I was still half-asleep, though, I was confident that the first thing I saw was... Rina's face.
     Everything went slow.
     She always had this comfortable scent. It unexpectedly soothed my nerves and my soul.
      I don't remember touching her face, but I grasped it, even if my eyes were closed, I knew it was her.
     One reason was there were only the two of us.
    The other reason was her fingertips.
     It smelled like musty paper where you can probably find them in old books, but her hands were soft I guess...
     I already knew where I was getting the salty flavor, it was from her mouth.
     I was guessing in my head if it came from the eggs or the ham she had.
     However, I was conscious. I was indeed half-awake, but I was conscious.
     I didn't reject her actions.
     I was aware that she kissed me.
     It is still a mystery why my heart wasn't beating so fast...
     It was too good to be true if that wasn't a dream...
     'I didn't move.'
     'I didn't made a sound.'
     'I didn't lay finger at her.'
     I was very grateful that didn't do anything to her.
     Still...
     I wanted to know why... did I accepted her contact.
     It felt warm, and...
     I did not hated it...
     My eyes were starting to open.
      "Did you sleep well?"
      I saw Rina's pinkish face again.
     'I wonder if she remembers the kiss?'
      "Am I... on your lap?" I asked her.
      "Sorry. You looked tired. I wanted you to relax comfortably," she answered.
      I don't really like laying down on this position, because I can see her face properly, especially, her lips. It was embarrassing for me to say it... And the last time I had a pillow-lap was from my mom, and it was years ago...
      "No... It's... fine..," I mumbled, trying to act calm. "H-How long I was sleeping?" I tried changing the subject.
     "More than two hours," Rina answered.
     "Two hours?" I dumbfounded. "It seems like I wasted a lot of your time doing nothing..."
     "It's okay. Besides, it was a good opportunity to watch your sleeping face this close," she giggled.
     I felt my face was flushing.
     "Please stop saying those embarrassing stuff so naturally, Rina," I begged.
     "I just wanted to try it," she giggled. She was clearly enjoying this. Well... That's good.
     "Want a bite?"
     Rina had some snacks with her.
     I opened my mouth.
     "It's mini-pancakes, but with cheese and egg in it. How is it?"
     "It tasted like breakfast," I answered.
     "Well, that's a good answer," she smiled.
     "Hey, Julian."
     "Yeah?"
     "Let's stay here for awhile. You still look tired, and I kinda want to finish this book," she concerned (as she tried to make up an excuse.)
     "Okay," I answered, resting on her lap.
     Rina began reading as she started to hum.
     "It seems that you didn't open the book," she noticed.
     "I was too tired to read. Rather than reading, tell me something I don't know," I asked.
     "I met a prince," she blurted out.
      "Hmm... What is he like?" I curiously asked.
       "He was the one wearing a beige cardigan," she answered.
        And I thought, "Ah, it's him."
      "I did thought he was pretty," I agreed.
      "It was like he was meant written for bookworms just like me. He was very beautiful," she awed. I don't think she can focus on reading anymore...
       "Well, if his hair was longer, I don't think he'll be a prince anymore."
       Then, I became convinced...
       "I didn't know you like princes," I mentioned.
       "Well, they're very common yet great characters. And most of the time, they're born smart, cool, and handsome. I mean, evil or not, they always have charisma. That's why there are always fangirls who like them."
      "Just like you, Rina," I commented.
      "Can't deny that," she replied. "Though, I like your types better, Julian. Don't you think guys like him are too perfect? If you I ask me, they're too sweet for my taste. I would rather order a cinnamon roll like... you."
      My heart won't stop beating, but I would die if it did.
      "I can't believe that you think that I taste like cinnamon," I humoured.
      "IT'S A DELIGHT," she argued.
      "THAT DEPENDS ON SOMEONE'S TASTE," I argued back.
     She pouted.
     Change the subject.
     "Let me see the 40 minutes you've took in making those bookmarks," I snatched them right before her nose, (she was hiding them inside the book), and I've noticed something...
      "You didn't use any blue," I wondered.
      "I decided to make it plain and simple," she answered.
      "I'm good at drawing cats, so I drew a cat. It also reminds me of you," she added.
     "Are you trying to seduce me?"
     "Is it working?"
     "Mmm," I replied. "And I guess this one is for me?"
     "Yeah. Yours is the orange one while mine's the white one."
      I stared at the orange tabby cat.  
      "You can use it in reading this book, Julian."
       "Mmm."
       "Sorry to say this, but the book's not mine, and so I'll be asking you to return this to Sidney later..."
      "Mmm."
      "Julian, are you okay?"
      I closed my eyes once again.
      "...I'm okay, I'm just tired..."
      I feel so sleepy...
      "Rina, is it okay to doze off?"
      "It's okay."
      That's good...
      "Rina... Thanks for the bookmark..."
      "Mmm."
      I felt her hand stroking my hair.
      'It was very nice.'
     'It was peaceful.'